Omega's Come in Threes

Tonight I am swimming in a sea of tasty Omega-3 Fatty Acids!

Courtesy of Trader Joe's, the most wonderful place in the U.S. for all your food-related needs, I purchased some Wild Alaskan Sock-eye Salmon. Was it ever wild! Low in mercury and high in nutrition, few supper's can compare. The only thing missing was a side of brussels sprouts.

Thick red, tender, slippery meat, silvery backs and dense with oil... I broiled two pieces rare in sesame seed and olive oil with garlic and capers. Three minutes of preparation yielded buttery pieces of heaven.

I just wanted to share with you how exciting a simple piece of salmon can be.
Many thanks to the fish who gave its life for the sake of this entry...

To search for all your Trader Joe's needs, please see: http://www.traderjoes.com/index.html

Reformers Wear Red

While the rest of the world dons orange and black with visions of candy corn awaiting eager little hands, Lutherans like me tend ignore the revelry in deference to Reformation Day. Not that Lutherans have any particular beef with Halloween - it is just as good as any day to enjoy friendly neighbors and tasty treats! But why worry about Halloween when one can wrap oneself in costume ribbons of merry, cherry, Reformation Red and go Reformation-Treating by knocking on doors and singing in frighteningly good four-part harmony "A Mighty Fortress Is Our God"? Reformation Day serves two purposes for us band of merry men. The first reason, is to delight in fellowship with one another. Reformation Day is indeed a cultural holiday! Since the Reformation occurred in the heart of Germany, may I suggest a heart-healthy celebration including the following menu items:

- Bratwurst with Brötchen and Mustard
- Glühwein
(A curiously warm, sweetened and herbed red wine. Don't drink to much or you'll see the visions of Ezekiel!)
- Beer. Thick, hearty lagers and stout.
- Dumplings. Any kind. There is never a day that is not good for a dumpling.
- Cheese
- Whole roasted hog with apple in mouth
- Cabbage (Kraut) steamed with apple slices
(red cabbage has more antioxidants and fussy eaters may like the sweetness of Rotkohl)
- Sweet apple desserts with raisins

Reformation Day in Lutherstadt-Wittenberg, 2005

In the fair city of Lutherstadt-Wittenberg a celebration takes place annually in the Reformation tradition of eating, drinking, singing, enjoying art and dancing, storytelling, and the seemingly discarded and lost art of theological disputation. When a Lutheran is on stage, the whole world laughs, as though from earth below to heaven we went. Reformation is often acknowledged as a grand cultural extravaganza, as if recognizing that on October 31st everyone gets to be German for a day! And since we are so merry this time of year, let us add lefse to the menu and not forget the joys of fellowship with our Scandinavian brothers and sisters! There is peculiar and comfortable joy in finding common cultural heritage. Back in Wittenberg the cobble stones and crackling air draw celebrateurs close, laughing over steaming mugs of wine and fingering thick yards of medieval felt fabric. There are parades of men in their stockings and velvet regalia, carrying torches to swipe close to the faces of young ones and singe the mustache of the fathers who hold them up to see. Midnight passes and there is no reason to turn in yet - the hog hasn't yet been picked dry! Reformation Day is indeed a good day to be German.

Yet, the second reason for celebrating Reformation Day is the foremost. Reformers don't celebrate to thumb noses at the Roman Catholics. Neither do they gather to revel in sin and other misdeeds as if the holiday were meant to be some sort of antinomian booze cruise. If we meant to celebrate in this way, Lutherans would be viciously trampling on the blood of both the Reformers and those who died in the 30 Years War in a disgusting display of deaths' victory in battle. It is for this reason also that I am kept from nailing a copy of the 95 Theses to the door of the Notre Dame University cathedral, just a few miles away...! Reformation Day is, in its best form, finally meant to serve as a day for confession. Not dry, decrepit recitations of, "oh, I've been a naughty boy, will you ever forgive me?", but instead a clear confession of what we believe as Christians.

Yes, indeed we believe that God is our Father and really into creating and providing for His creation! Yes, we really buy into this Jesus Christ as His Son who died for us to give us life! Oh, and as if that weren't enough, we really get into the notion that God sends His Spirit to be with us, giving us strength outside of ourselves long enough for faithfulness to break into our stony, unbelieving hearts.

What a day to wear red! Reformation is the day when we Christians recognize the duress the church faces, even when 30 Year Wars with the Catholics do not loom in our horizon. Today Christians still recognize that people really aren't into hearing about Jesus because such confessions smack of intolerance and absolute truth claims. Christians confess into the crowds owned by MTV and Oprah, who wonder "how can I live the best life?", and upon hearing about this Jesus, the others feel attacked that the best life occurs from outside of the self. A strange message in our present

And so Reformation Day revelers gather in red for nothing more than a little taste of Easter before our winter hibernation. We gather in the face of opposition and duress; in the face of the those who think [Lutheran] Christianity to be a mess of moralism or lawlessness. We gather in trust that even without bratwurst and wine, there is something to be excited about. While our Halloweening counterparts shroud themselves in zombie costumes and tell scary stories, we Lutherans gather specifically to thumb our noses at the grave. We dance around the charter of freedom Christ has given us, in sure and certain declaration that one day our dear Jesus will call us up out of our rotting graves for something better; death has no final word in this world. There are no spirits to appease, no ghoulies to steal the soul, and no devil to fear. While Luther recognized spirits and demons and the devil indeed exist and are to be feared as those who would attack, when clinging to the Word of God alone, fear dissipates because the grave becomes a laughable thing. The grave is a prison which can never hold those caught up in faith. This is why on Reformation Day we sing with heart and gusto:

The Word they still shall let remain
Nor any thanks have for it;
He's by our side upon the plain
With His good gifts and Spirit.
And take they our life,
Goods, fame, child and wife,
Though life be wrenched away,
They cannot win the day;
The Kingdoms' ours forever.

So, should anyone seek to take our dear possessions - even if life be wrenched away - we confess with boldness, joy, and vigor that those deaths will never have the last word. The Kingdom is ours in the face of death. Those who confess have the promise of resurrection and will rise up to new life. It is this confession and proclamation that brings life and freedom. So, hug a Lutheran today and know the joy of Reformation!
And while you're add it, spread the Word. Go Reformation-treating! Who knows, maybe your neighbor will be moved to keep steadfast in your spirited words and offer up a sweet treat to send you on your way...


Just for fun:
Here are Prayers of the People I wrote in accord with the 10 Commandments.

PRAYERS OF INTERCESSION

[P]astor: Let us pray for the life of the world, the intentions of the faithful, and for any in sorrow or in need.

A brief silence.

P (I am the Lord your God. You shall have no other gods)

We thank you Lord that you are our God and You have made us your people. Send us your Holy Spirit so that we will fear, love, and trust You above all things. Lord, in your mercy,

[C]ongregation Hear our prayer

P (You shall not take the name of the Lord your God in vain)

We thank you that you have given your name to us, that we might pray to you as children speak to their loving Father. We pray that Your name and Your Word be placed in our hearts and on our tongues. We especially ask for your protection today for our dear brothers and sisters in Christ who speak Your Name in the midst of danger and death. Keep us from using your name to curse, swear, lie, or deceive, and help us to always call upon you in prayer, praise, and thanksgiving. Lord, in your mercy,

C Hear our prayer

P (Remember the Sabbath and Keep it holy)

Lord, keep us from neglecting your Word and the preaching of it so that we may regard it as Holy and gladly hear and learn it. We pray today for Christ Lutheran Church and all congregations throughout the world. Please send us trustworthy pastors and leaders who will freely preach your Gospel in our church, at home, and in our daily work. Lord, in your mercy,

C Hear our prayer

P (Honor your father and mother)

We give you thanks, dear Father, that you have given us loving fathers and mothers and others who care for us in all of our daily needs. Make our homes a place of peace and comfort so that we might know your love in our closest relationships. Help us so that we do not despise or anger our parents or others in authority, but respect, love, serve, and obey them. Lord, in your mercy,

C Hear our prayer

P (You shall not kill)

We pray that You continue to breathe life into this world, Lord. Protect us from everything that seeks to take our life; from sickness and diseases, from fractured relationships, and from death and the loss of our loved ones. We ask today that you bring your healing and comfort to these we name before You now[...]. Please protect us from sin, death, and the Devil with all of his empty promises. Keep us from harming our family or neighbor in any way, but give us hands and hearts to help them in all of their physical needs.

C Hear our prayer

P (You shall not commit adultery)

Lord, we ask that you help us honor the promises of marriage and all of the gifts and responsibilities this blessing brings. Please help to remember the promises made to our spouse so that our families might grow in love and trust. In all matters of relationship, keep our words and conduct pure and honorable, so that husband and wife love and respect each other. Lord in your mercy,

C Hear our prayer

P (You shall not steal)

Lord, we recognize our deep longing for the good gifts of this world. Please help us so that we do not take our neighbor’s money or property or get them in any dishonest way. Instead, help us to improve and protect the possessions of others. Give us the ability to recognize the needs of others so that Your good gifts are distributed to all in need of food, water, shelter, and protection. Lord, in your mercy,

C Hear our prayer

P (You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor)

Lord, keep the words of our mouths and the meditations of our hearts from all evil. Help us so that we do no betray, slander, or lie about our neighbors or family, but defend them and speak well of them, and explain their in the kindest way. Lord, in your mercy,

C Hear our prayer

P (You shall not covet your neighbors’ house, wife, husband, workers, cattle, or anything else that is theirs)

Lord, pour us out for the sake of our neighbor so that we help others keep and protect what is theirs. Give us honorable words and conduct so that we do not tempt or coax away our neighbors’ spouse, workers, or possessions, but encourage them to remain loyal. Lord, in your mercy,

C Hear our prayer

P All of these things and whatever else you see that we need, grant us, dear Father. We offer our prayers before you, trusting in your love; through Jesus Christ our Lord,

C Amen.

The Kingdom is ours forever!
Happy Reformation Day!

Confirmation Questions - Week 6

Our lesson became a muddled effort at explaining law and gospel. Pastor explained how the law is "like when you ride your bike and run into a mailbox and get a scar." Of course this prompted my small group to a great 20-minute comparison of our best scars! I was so impressed because my two quietest kids couldn't wait to show off every death-defying injury they had ever inflicted upon themselves. The one boy who never talks was anxious to tell about five different stories of how he earned gravel in the sides of his legs, face, arms... you name it. Our group decided to name him "Skid," and he is very proud of the new nickname!

Betty and Dan lead the other small group and they have had a tough time lassoing the energy of those kids! While I have seven boys and two girls who need to have discussions pulled out of them with a plier, the other group just won't stop talking. Dan became very irate with the kids when they began talking over Betty. They seem to have an unfortunate grouping of the "popular" kids. There are a few self-proclaimed "Drama Queens," some "Skater Dudes," and then there are the boys who busy themselves trying to catch the attention of one young lady who simply needs to bat her eyes in their direction and they melt into a stuttering puddle. Betty and I suggested that perhaps come January (at the beginning of the new semester), we should try a two month stint of separating the boys and the girls for small group. That way there might not be the competition and attention-getting behavior, as well as the hope for questions and discussions that might not happen in the presence of potential embarrassment in front of the opposite sex.

The Confirmation "Question Ministry" is going very well and, strangely enough, Betty and Dan's group get into it even way more than my own group. Ironically, last week, they had not even discussed Halloween and it was strange and interesting how all of their questions related. Betty told me they were all completely silent when writing their questions on the paper scraps! We ended up having some helpful discussions about what the origins of the holiday were, how it was not intended for "devil worship" (but we did discuss Satanism), and there was also a good discussion about Wicca and pagan worship. I feel tremendously lucky that while I was in college I had a number of dear friends involved in Wicca. They were always open about answering questions and took a lot of the taboo and fear out of their tradition. Furthermore, they were and continue to be dependable, kind, contributing, and bright individuals, certainly not to be feared or avoided. As a result, the discussion we had with the kids was clearly not intended to develop a fear or disgust for those of alternative [pagan] traditions, but to draw up a clear delineation regarding faith and religious practice. The kids are not to be encouraged to practice witchcraft in any way and we pointed out why that is unacceptable in the Christian faith. However, we were also able to point out how those who are involved in Wicca are not to be feared as regarded as anyone less than friends we work or go to school with. Children need to have taboo and fear removed from other faith traditions, because taboo breeds a potent mixture of curiosity and contempt. The confirmation children will certainly meet those involved in pagan worship, whether with children who dabble in it in high school, certainly in college, and is the growing interest of bored housewives. They need to be aware that paganism is not the same tradition as satanism, and still have a clear understanding why Christians cannot participate in pagan ritual or belief because of distinct and opposing beliefs. If anyone is interested in the paperwork I drew up for the class, please let me know!

Here is the list of confirmation questions for Week 6:

1. What was the Garden of Eden?
2. Both on the same page:
- Why is St. Micheal called the Arch engle? [sic]
- Can I really ask anything I want, even if its not about chirch? [sic]
3. If God wants us to live a good, happy life, then why are we put under so much stress and
pain?
(from my dear boy who instigated the farting contest last week during group - but comes every week complaining about how difficult and exhausting school is for him.)
4. What is heaven like after you die?
5. If someone doesn't practice the same religion as you (say their Hindu), does that mean they go to hell?
6. If God created everything (heaven and earth) then where did the Devil come from? And if God created him, why would He?
7. What do you think was the greatest event in the Bible?
8. Where is chocolate in the Bible? Do you like hot cocoa and where did it come from?
(a very important question, don't you think??)
9. Why did you decide to become a pastor? (see candidacy essay for details...)
10. How much food can you eat? (huh?)
11. Is the Bible written in a sequence?

And I saved the three most interesting questions for last:

1. Was the things that people said in the Grate Awakening only to get people to confes there sins? [sic]
(Seriously, what kid asks something like that! What a brilliant question - he's in *8th* grade!)

2. As a kid, I really haven't had any "experiences" with God. What happened to yo uthat changed your outlook on Christianity?
(Whoa - deep question. I am really impressed with his honesty)

3. Why do you have to be so cool?
(I'm just going to assume he's not actually asking why *I* have to be so cool - because anyone who knows me knows I'm not! I'm thinking he's concerned about the pressure to be cool that surrounds him at school - and also follows him to confirmation. What do you out there in blogland think? You might be more in tune than I am.)


That's it for today, friends!

A Very Parker Picnic

Kelsay came to visit from Sunday until this beautiful Tuesday morning.
Ordinary things are never so delightful as they are with a dear friend.

Confirmation Questions - Week 5

Here are the confirmation questions I found in my box when I returned from an exciting few days at home (more to come on my exciting three days at home soon!). I don't think my dear confirmation partner gathered questions from our group (that, or maybe he'll be busy at home answering them himself...) so these are only from the other group. As you can see, I'm thinking they enjoyed a very focused conversation. I'm feeling a whole lot of "cut and paste" coming on...

1. Does Halloween have anything to do with Christianity?

2. Why is Halloween a big holiday when it is about the devil?

3. Does Halloween have anything to do with God?

4. What are you going to be for Halloween?

5. What does ‘Halloween’ mean?

6. Is Halloween considered worshipping the devil?

This is the point at which I'd like to add a fun photo or decorative image, of, say, a pumpkin or pretty October foliage. But I found this one and just have to add it. Perhaps I should label it "for mature audiences only. ...and now that I think about the maturity of this audience... well...

My Italian Crush

Pat Rodio has lived up the street from me on Cedar in Fairfax, just at the halfway point of our long avenue, across from the old Keith mansion. He is a pillar of Fairfax City as one of the oldest residents and most involved in political processes of anyone out here. From the park service to the building up of residential zones, a park with the Rodio name, all the way down the details of street signage (the stop sign midway down our street marks where his youngest was killed by an automobile many, many years ago) and supporting the Little League baseball teams, Mr. Rodio has been involved in all aspects of Fairfax civil and political life. Mr. Rodio also likes to eat at Old Country Buffet every blessed day for lunch.
He is 87, about 5'5", feisty, and proudly Italian-American.

Most importantly, I am proud to be one of his two "favorite girlfriends" (the other one is my Mom!). What can he say? He's got a natural thing for Gessert women! He called my home today because "a little bird told him [I] was in town and [he] needed a little flirt time." When Mr. Rodio would be out on a walk and see me leave with a date, whether it be to prom or otherwise, he duly threatened: "hurt her and I'll break your knees." It's good to have links to the mafia.

He has followed me every step of the way, buying Girl Scout cookies only from me (I was his girlfriend beginning in kindergarten!) and making darn sure I was making the grade in school. It is strong men like him - rising to the top with a modest education, insatiable curiosity, deep love for his neighbor, and of course an incurable passion for old jazz - that we can look to today and thank God for.

Where have you gone Patrick Rodio? Our nation turns its lonely eyes to you... woo woo woo...

But before I get ahead of myself and dive onto the soap box (Mr. Rodio probably knows the origins of the idiom...!), I will always be so glad that my first boyfriend was and continues to be Mr. Patrick Rodio.


Check out a map to Rodio Park:
www.fairfaxva.gov/ParksRec/CityParks.asp

Fairfax, VA

Thank God for my family. I'm home.

Oh Boy.

Question #8. Gets you every time.
It seems like the free will will get you every time...
(Kristen, is there a grammatical term that names the double occurrence of one necessary word - like in the sentence above or "had had"?)

It's 12:42 and I'm leaving to go to VA in about 10 hours. Which means I need to have all these questions before I begin packing. Thats right. Before I begin packing.

Tonight I held the first "What Lutherans Believe Class" and 4 people showed up. They don't seem to be nearly as excited as I am about Reformation history. Silly me... and I thought the Augsburg Confession was a real thrill...

Confirmation Questions

Today is blogtastic! Here is this weeks' selection of confirmation questions from my darling 8th graders. And Don. Except Don didn't ask a question. But I thought I'd mention him. Dear, dear Don.

1. If Adam and Eve didn't eat the fruit of knowledge, would be be like other animals?
2. Why did God create the earth and humans? He could of had the whole universe to Himself. Human are just sinful, what good do we do Him? (I like this kid!)
3. How is God with me at school?
4. Why does the Bible have so many different stories? (same one who asked "why does the Bible have so many weird stories?" Yikes... I don't know what to say!)
5. Why are there so many kinds of religions. Does it mader what you think all that maders is that you believe and love God. If you go to church and see people you don't know and some of them don't believe the same exact stuff you do, they were separate into smalle rhtings. All that maders is loving God. [sic]... I think I get the gist...]
6. How do I know if God forgives even if I have sinned greatly?
7. In God's mind, are we ever considered bad people?
8. Why does God not step in so that good people don't do bad things? (any ideas??)
9. How do you get confirmed?
10. Does God promise us whatever we want?

There you have it folks! Any help with them is very much welcomed and appreciated! Especially #8. That one always gets me. This is a theological 911 emergency!

Hurry, God Squad!

A Good Legal Resource

For all of you out there on either the preaching or the listening end, pay attention:

http://www.suntimes.com/news/metro/585247,CST-NWS-priest03.article

I can't figure out if the moral of the story is:
a. don't criticize your preacher
b. don't humiliate your parishioner
c. do both a & b for the general amusement of others
d. send this to your candidacy committee for edification

Enjoy!

The Dangers of a Globalized World

Fussy about good theology? Yes.
Fussy about making the grade? Guilty.
Fussy about eating a well-balanced meal? It's true.
Fussy about a clean, military-style made bed? I'll admit it.
Fussy about hygiene? Thankfully.

Fussy about a strict beauty regime, involving makeup, hair, nails, skin care, etc.? Not really.

Perhaps I should be - just ask my dear sorority little sister JoAnn - but I figure a pleasant, natural, well-kept look is about the extent I should go for the sake of day-to-day personal decoration. Essentials in my beauty routine include a shower (complete with soap), SPF 50, and lip balm. But today I was a little bored. And any good Puritan would know that boredom leads straight down the road to perdition... or in this case, to the nail salon.

Tomorrow I will be speaking at Pastor Norland's church about stewardship and Wednesday I will be flying out to the D.C. area to see my family and friends (and Candidacy Day, courtesy of the D.C. Metro Synod). This seemed to call for a flight of fancy, especially since the Uppity East Coasters delight in a well-kept Ann-Taylorized, J.Crew accessorized appearance. So I decided to get my nails done. And no, not just halfway... no siree. Hands and nails.

------------
Public Service Announcement for Confused Seminarians and Graduate Students:
In beauty speak, this is commonly known as a "manicure" and "pedicure," manicure from the Latin manus for "hand" (plus cura, "to care") and pedicure from the Latin pes or pedis (very close to the Greek pod- or pous for "foot"). These two words relate to the process the world understands to be effective hand and foot care.
------------

Now, the last time I had this done, I found the experience to be quite enjoyable. I was with my dear best friend Kelsay Parker - and really, what experience isn't enjoyable with Kelsay, I'd like to know! There is something about participating in beauty regimes that unite a girl with all females worldwide. Whether it is decorating with henna, pierced ears, lace-trimmed colors, looking lovely in a gown or traditional dress, wearing stodgy-yet-fashionable coats to work, preparing hair... it all has a uniting effect: "We have a secret little ladies club of self-care." I thought by getting my nails done I could re-enter into the fabulous world of feminine beauty and mystique. Who knew what would be in store?

But this time, it proved dangerous. Perhaps nearly deadly.

I drove all over tarnation trying to find a blessed place and stumbled across a shopping mall. A shopping mall! Who knew they had them in Indiana? Surely a shopping mall would provide a clean, welcoming environment for an unwitting beauty customer like myself.

"Nail Trix" seemed a little nicer and just as cost-effective as "Le Nails." Plus, it was busy with nice-looking Hoosiers milling around waiting their turn. I wrote my name on the waiting list.
As I turned to sit down, there appeared to be no where to sit and so I continued standing. No big deal. But then about five or six different salon employees came and asked me what I was doing there. Here is a rough verbatim of our conversation (I tried to put it in the accent/vernacular of the individuals involved - I believe the women and men who operate the salon are Vietnamese who have limited English):

Employee 1: "Oh, hello - you wait for nail done?"
Natalie:"Thank you, I'm waiting for an appointment. I just put my name on the list... I can just stand."
Employee 1: "Oh! You stand! You sit, maybe? You find place. I find you place."
(disappears to the back)
Employee 2: "You have name on list? Your name better be on list or you no get nails done!"
Natalie: "My name is on the list."
Employee 3: "What you want done?"
Natalie: "A manicure and pedicure"
Employee 2: "Oh you don't want eyebrow done? All girls want eyebrow!"
Natalie: "No, just the manicure and pedicure will be great, thanks."
Employee 1 (returns): "You find place to sit?"
Natalie (thinking "you said you were going to find a place"): "No, but I'm fine... I'll just wait."
Employee 4 (walking up from the back): "I be done soon. You find place to sit."
Natalie: "I'm fine, I"ll just wait, thanks."
Employee 5: "I done faster than her - I do your nail."
Natalie: "Okay, whatever works best for you."
A seat opens up and I sit down next to a woman laughing at this entire exchange.
Employee 4: "I finish faster than her - you come sit in chair."

I went and sat in the tall pedicure chair and watch in horror as she simply drains the water from the last woman and fills it up with water for me - no scrubbing or disinfect apparently needed. But maybe she knows better than me? I can roll with it.

As I'm enjoying the warm water and bubbles, Employee 5 is continuing to work on the feet of the woman next to me. This woman is Irish and we strike up a brief conversation. Then Employee 5 returns and speaks to the woman:

Employee 5: "You sit... dry nail."
Irish Woman: "When can I get up?"
Employee 5: "You sit!"
Irish Woman: "May I pay?"
Employee 5: "Yes, you pay."
Irish Woman: "How much?"
Employee 5: "[cannot understand her]"
Irish Woman: "What?"
Natalie: It is $15 (I had seen the sign)
Employee 5: "Yes."
The Irish woman, only here visiting her daughter for two weeks, plunks down $35.
Natalie: "You just put down $35. It is only $15."
The Irish woman puts down $10.
Natalie: "You need to put the $5 back in - and you should probably give her a tip - maybe three or four extra dollars."
The Irish woman puts down a total of $20 and says "Service was terrible! I don't want to give her more!" I don't say anything. Employee 5 picks up the money and says "Thank you - come back soon!"

Back to my own chair with Employee 4. She sits down and begins attacking my feet with various and sundry equipment. I never knew a clipper could hurt! And my hackles rose as she attached a straight blade to some contraption and then I observed loads of flesh from my feet fall onto the towel below. How blood did not flow - I'll never know. Then she took a scrub with the same consistency of steel wool and rubbed any feeling I had left off of the bottom of my feet. I had noted on the board outside that some sort of massage was also included. There is no better way to make me completely relaxed and happy than to rub my feet, so I was looking forward to this. I was ready to pour out an extra measure of blessing on any one person who was willing to do the job. And then she began. Her claws dug into the lines of my feet and I think my sinews and tendons are now permanently separated from the muscles. It was not the relaxing experience I had expected. Perhaps it is a cultural difference? Maybe Vietnamese people like painful, nail-digging massages. But I'm not going to pass judgment or make gross generalizations. My dear Vietnamese friends never seemed like they were really into pain...

Finally, the pain was over and I was recovering Employee 4 asked, "What color you want on nail - you want color or French?" I'm not sure what "French" is, but color I know. So I requested a dark pink, maybe a mauve? She comes out with blood red and "power suit pink." After negotiating my own versus her personal preference, I ended up with a deep berry color. It will do. Who knew a small Asian lady could apply such pressure in matters physical and decision-making?

As she led me over to experience the same high quality of hygiene and brute-force hand massage, another employee (Employee 6) sauntered over. She was falling out of her teeny-weeny blue polka-dot tankini... actually it was just a tank top... and proceeded to whisper sweet nothings in her native language to Employee 4. They were looking over my shoulder and giggling and I couldn't quite figure out if they were talking about me or another employee or another patron. What I wouldn't give to have had a firm grasp of Asian languages in that moment.

After my nails were turned the cheery berry red, I was led over to some UV lamps to dry.
Employee 4: "You sit. You sit five minute and go home."
Natalie said: "Okay. Thank you."
Natalie thought: "Never again. Indeed, I go home. I stay home."

Beauty seems more painful than its worth.

My Nails.
(just kidding...)

What Do You Say to the Guy Who Just Took Your Cheese?

Thats Nach-o Cheese!

I have a dear friend who is looking for a particular kind of cheese.
Here is a brief description:

- It is a type of Syrian Cheese
- It is somewhat smoky in taste
- It is somewhat "curly"... looking like "pigs tail"
(my thinking is that it is the sort of dry, smoked Slovak cheese I used to love)

He is convinced it is Syrian Cheese.

I googled (not ogled) some Syrian cheese options and the closest match seems to be a type called "Shalal" (not halal). Does anyone have any ideas about how or where to purchase some of this? At least, unlike the last post, I am seeking legal substances...

No, Virginia, it's Mary Magdalene... not Mary Jane

Now that you have had the chance to tour my lovely apartment, set in the middle of scenic downtown Valpo, I'd like to introduce you to my neighbors.

I have lived here for five weeks now and up until last Saturday I had not once caught even a glimpse of the foursome living above me. However, while I had never seen them, I did know an fair bit about them. For starters:
- I could tell they were young twenty-somethings.
-They also really like techno music with a bouncing, firm baseline.
-They have a gaming system with which they practice the art of loudly blowing things up.
- They recently bought Halo 3. I can't wait to hear how they do.
-They often return from their nighttime barhopping with shouts of joy and a loud narrative about their recent activities.

I was also fairly convinced that not only was there two boys and two girls living up there, chances are by the other loud nighttime activities they enjoy, they were coupled. And while I couldn't quite tell the layout of the apartment, from the sounds of it, they like to practice windsprints from about 1-3 a.m.

Long story short:
They didn't seem like the kind of neighbors I could call for a spare cup of sugar.

My grandmother and uncle visited last week and asked about my neighbors and I told them the story, but they mentioned, "you know, you really should at least meet them." So, after my family pulled out to go home, I was still in good spirits and thought, "Gee! I should go knock on their door!"

So I did.

Only one of the tenants was home, Chris, with a friend of his. Being a friendly kind of guy, he invited me in. Here is a short "verbatim" of our time together:

Chris: Hey, do you smoke?
Natalie: "No, thank you, though."
And then he held out a joint.
Chris:"No, I mean, do you "SMOKE."
Natalie: "Oh, no thank you - I think they do random drug testing at work."
And Chris again: "Oh, what do you do?"
Natalie: "I'm a pastor at Christ Lutheran up the road."
Chris: "Oh man. You aren't gonna call the moral police or the cops or anything, are you?"
Natalie: "No. Just be careful about putting out your smokes. Don't burn down the building and we'll be fine."
Chris: "Sounds good... Well, can you nuns drink?"
Natalie, feeling like her badboy image is being threatened: "I'm not a nun, and yes, I love a good beer."
Chris: "Oh good. We drink Coors here. I'll let you know when we party next."
Natalie: "Thanks! I'd love to come by."

Then Chris told me he has never gone to church and thought it might be cool to ask some
questions sometime.

The next day when I walked down the stairs, I noticed "someone" had stolen a few gold foil letters off the other mailboxes and posted "Pastor" above my lastname - with the "R" as a vertical hyphen and the rest haphazardly penned in.
I think I'll invite him to church for Advent.

Thats the news from out here. If you need a smoke, I know where to find it.

Peace out,
Pastor Marley

Prayer Requests

Dear Readers,

I'd like to offer up a few prayer requests for those in need:

1. Arly and Shirley as Shirley battles ALS (Lou-Gehrig's Disease)
2. Roger and Dolores as Roger battles ALS as well

Both of these couples are strong in their faith and strong in their battles. But even while the Devil prowls around us and tries to separate us as sheep from the herd, we hear the voice of our Savior Jesus Christ coming to get us and bring us back to safety. It is in faith we know that even while we watch our old bodies turn against us, wasting away into death, our good Lord promises that what we see is not what will be. He tells us a scrap of bread is really His body, He calls up sinners to tell them God treats them as though they were saints, and proclaims the hope of life is hidden even in the unsightliness and fear of death. We live under the sign of the opposite. Life is hidden up in Shirley and Roger, even while they look more like death. Life is also hidden up in Arly and Dolores as their hands are blessed with love and patience - even while their eyes betray exhaustion, fear, and loneliness of a life without their beloved to come.

So lets lift these saints of the faith up in prayer. Lets be so bold as to pray for a miracle - that Roger and Shirley will have a complete restoration of the body - and lets do that without fear that we might be disappointed. I have to admit that I'm afraid of that disappointment. But just like yesterday's reading from the prophet Habakkuk (chapter 1 - the actual reading was 1:1-4 and 2:1-4... but the whole reading is great), we can take up the voice of the prophet and raise our cry of anger and fear of pain and death to God... in full expectation of a response. And God does respond (1:5):

"Be astonished! Be astounded! For a work is being done in your days that you would not believe... even if you were told."

God's right. There's a lot of things God can do, that I'm not sure I would believe, even if God gave me a pre-emptive heads up. But as a Christian, I've been called to cry out with honesty... and even with anticipation of response. The Holy Spirit puts a Word of sorrow and grief, of love for these dear neighbors and of expectation, trusting that the words don't fall on deaf ears. Its a tall order. But God even promised that He would provide the trust needed to even pray with such candor, strength, and persistence.

God will come in spite of death. Even though Roger's formerly strong body - once used to fly planes, hold his wife, and show his children and grandson how to drive a boat - now looks crumpled and rebellious against life, God is there with him. God promises to be found even as He hides life in the middle of death. God comes not in the holy places, but in the middle of life; coming only to die in a junk heap outside of Jerusalem. God has come in His Son Jesus Christ to raise this sick man and sick woman from the rubble and waste of their old bodies.

So even while we can live in certainty that their bodies will be renewed as they are ushered into the arms of God in heaven, lets take up the mantle of the prophet Habakkuk and cry out with question and expectation "Violence! And you will not save?"

God, I'm sure You will astonish us - and give us strength to believe even in the face of death. So come now and let us see Your saving hand. We're waiting, impatiently and with expectation.



Oh, and I forgot one who is also very important:
Please pray for Shelton Root, who has had a major facial reconstruction (rhinoplasty). He's in quite a bit of pain and needs prayers for comfort, strength, and faith that it is God who will provide for him.

Mike Huckabee responds to evolution question

This video is startling, as a Presidential candidate chooses to clearly and directly answer a question posed to him by the inimitable Wolf Blitzer (who sometimes moonlights undercover at Luther Seminary under the pseudonym "Dr. Fred Gaiser"). While I am not attempting to make any sort of political statement in this post regarding my future voting intentions, Mr. Huckabee's response is showing himself to be both a notable and admirable candidate. Enjoy!

Happy Friendship Anniversary!

Today marks a very special day in my life.

Today is the 1-year friendship anniversary for Shannyn Magee and I! She and I met for the first time in the short days before the 2006 Twin Cities Marathon, then we became "real" friends while running the first few miles of the TCM together. Shannyn was amazing! She really helped me get through the first 5 miles.

In addition to that - pastors take note - she is one of the few truly caring, down-to-earth and theologically astute youth pastors I have met during my few years at seminary. But hands off! I call dibs on Shan for associate in the years to come.

Cheers to a great year of friendship, Shannyn - and here's to many more!

(this is a photo of Shannyn and I running the marathon together)

Stump the Dummy

Dear Readers,

It seems that when it rains it pours - at least as far as posting new blogs is concerned.

Today was confirmation night and it went pretty well. This was the first one I have taught (the pastor is gone) and the topic was "Introduction to the Scripture" for the 8th graders. We had a great time and the kids were really engaged!

At the end of every session I have them turn in a question about the lesson, God, life, how faith relates to life - anything. But they have to turn in one per week. They put their name on the question and then I get busy with my own homework and write them out a response by the following week. They usually ask really great question - they become some of my best teachers. Here is a selection of the great questions they turned in this week. Enjoy!:

1. If God doesn't want us to sin, why did he put the tree of knowledge in the Garden of Eden?
2. Did Martain Luther start the Luthern chirch? (sic)
3. Over the times that you are influenced to move away from God, how does he keep bringing you back to him?
4. Why did God want to name Jesus, Jesus?
5. Why did the people call the Bible, the Bible and where did they get all the names for the chapters?
6. How can God love someone through someone when he already loves the person?
7. What are some ways that we can turn away from God, and how can we refrain from this as much as possible?
8. Why does God forgive every person no matter what the person does?
9. If we beleive that we will go to heaven for believing in our God, then what will happen to the people that believe in a different God or no God at all?
10. What is the job of an angel?
11.Why does the Bible have weird stories?
12.Can the Bible be added on to?
13.If all your sins are forgiven , then will you be forgiven for murdering?
14.How do you think God watches us all?
15.Why did they decide to put Song of Songs in the Bible?
16. If God created everything, then why did he create the Devil?
17.Where did the Devil come from?

If anyone has any suggestions on how to answer some of these, please throw your hat in with ideas! I really enjoy these kids. They are an insightful group, aren't they? There's nothing more challenging than a group of 8th graders in the grips of junior high - but I'm convinced that God has a stronger hold.

A Side Note

Just a note that I am describing members of the church under alternative names/identities. I hope you see the humor in the descriptions rather than any disdain! I esteem the members of this congregation and am grateful to be part of this community.

Don.

I have a gentleman at my church named Don. I'm about to hit the eject button on him.

Even though the pastor said, "I don't like kids," he is very jealous of his teaching time for 8th grade confirmation. Pastor teaches for about 45 minutes and then we break into two groups for reflection and discussion. Betty and Dan lead one, Don and I lead the other.

Now, Don is a former commanding officer in the Canadian Navy (we can't deport him, he took the citizenship oath last week). He is really into order and morality. There is a clear way one should do everything - including, and especially, theology. The Bible is clearly a book of rules we should take seriously if we are ever to hammer out the straight and narrow to heaven.

The first week was fine. After the pastor fumbled on "The Salvation Story" (where Jesus comes to get you out of the "Death Camp" and you better reach up and grab His hand otherwise you won't be saved... if I can locate the pamphlet, I'll try to scan it for humor's sake), Don and I broke into our small group. Our discussion was about sin - What is sin. Am I sinful? So I had the kids put a percentage on how much "sin" and how much "good" they each thought they were. We eventually got to realization humanity is 100% sinful with God, in Christ, giving us the title "100% saved" alongside the sinner piece. Don didn't like that too much. So ever since I threatened his Pelagian niceties, Don has taken over the group entirely. He talks over me, He undercuts my questions, and has a horrible habit of essentially damning the kids to a life of fearing God as a big stick. You gossip? It's hell for you. You don't listen to your parents? I hope you don't like the flames. You cheat on a test? No love for you! According to Don, Jesus has left the building. Or is simply a moral superstar of Mary Katherine Gallagher's caliber.

It gets better.

We held a leadership huddle in which I was supposed to present. I titled the study, "Oprah is Not Your Preacher." Everyone seemed to get on the ride with me. Except Don. Apparently telling kids their sins are forgiven in the name of Jesus Christ is a really bad idea. So Don stood up and said, "I'd like to read something out of Scripture:

A woman should learn in quietness and full submission. I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man; she must be silent. For Adam was formed first, then Eve. And Adam was not the one deceived; it was the woman who was deceived and became a sinner.
(1 Timothy 2:11-13)

So how do address that, Vicar? Seems like you shouldn't be doing all this talking in church."

Thank you, Don. A wonderful moment in the life of this ministry. I answered by explaining how Scripture interprets Scripture. The purpose of Scripture is not to be a treasure map or rule book to guide one into heaven. Scripture instead tells the story of how God comes for His people - and He will have them, whether they like it, know they need it, or care. And so even the rules of Scripture are intended to promote those things which give life - to promote this proclamation of God's persistent love to create faith in Him, specifically through Jesus Christ. Because to have faith, is to have real life. Last I checked, my female parts did not get in the way of proclaiming this Word.

Thats right, Don. Jesus loves you too.