The Vicar of Valpo

Men are from Venus and Girls are from...?

2008-02-14T14:43:00.002-06:00

I thought you might enjoy this exercise from last Sundays' Senior High youth group. One of the topics the kids wanted to discuss was "Dating - Christian Style?" So we had an initial activity where guys and girls were separated and they each came up with lists of questions for the other. Then the group reconvened and answered before presenting them to the mixed group. The differences are a trip! High schoolers are such funny creatures... just exploring their little world and making unwittingly true commentary about the rest of us while they are at it.

I color coded everything using the traditional pink/blue (red/blue - its clearer) motif so you would know who is who asking/answering. Enjoy! If you have your own question/answer feel free to submit it in blog comments!
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boys questions for the girls:

Why do girls go to the bathroom in pairs or packs?

So we can gossip or avoid being gossiped about or to borrow female hygiene items

Why do girls buy so many clothing and accessory items?

To look good for you. Plus we like shopping and when we shop, we’re bonding with each other.

Why do girls cry during movies (chick flicks)?

Because they’re sad. And maybe we connect to something that happens.
Note: Jessica has never cried in a movie

What do girls seriously want?

Loyalty. Honesty. Trust. And openness, communication, being yourself, a sense of humor, being a best friend, sensitive (comforting), being up front about ending a relationship. Seriously, don’t cheat. Be a man – its going to hurt to end it, but its better that we know up front

Why do girls think they have to be so manipulative?

We are afraid to say the trust and don’t want to hurt the other persons feelings.

Why do girls call sports ‘stupid’?

STEREOTYPING!

What is a good first date?

Not a movie! Dinner or anywhere public you can talk, like Starbucks or mini-golf – not at a house.

Why do girls expect us to know what they are thinking?

Because its hard for us to put into words and you rush us and cut us off and we’re afraid of your reaction or rejection.

Why do girls expect them to do so many things for us?

Not all girls expect to be waited on! But we expect courtesy and respect. We want you to be a gentleman. Compliments are greatly appreciated.

Why are girls such whiners (a general statement – not all are)?

We’re just more verbal than you are. Whining is sometimes just trying to keep conversation going and break the silence because you won’t talk.

If you could be a transformer, what would you transform to?

Not Megatron

What do you like most about guys?

Eyes, hair, smile, height (we like taller than us), shoulders. But those things are only part of it. We also like gentle boldness, a sense of humor, being willing to talk, being yourself, treating you like a friend, intelligence, and being able to hold a good confident conversation.

What do you dislike most about guys? (pet peeves)

Egotistical, treating you differently around their male friends,

What is the purpose of playing mind games with guys?

Some girls think they have to do that to keep it interesting and to keep you around.

Why do some girls hold grudges for so long?

Our emotions are more easily hurt and your lack of communication keeps the problem going. Girls want guys to realize what they did.

Why are girls so mean to each other?

Some are competing for guys’ attention because of their own insecurities.

If you could only have three things on an island what would they be?

Music
Physical Activity (like a ball)
Chocolate

If you were in any Star Wars movies would you be a Sith lady or be a Jedi lady? Would you join the empire or the rebels?

Rebels!

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girls questions for the boys

Why do guys take so long to make the first move? Why do they refuse to be leaders? Are they waiting for a signal, and if so, what is it?

Because we are supposed to know what you are thinking but we don’t. We are afraid of being rejected. Good signals are having conversations and giving eye-contact.

Why are guys secretive about their feelings?

We are NOT! Why are you not more observant?

Why do guys ask your opinion and feelings and then they get upset with the answer?

You don’t answer the question the way we wanted you to or just avoid it.

Why do guys act so macho?

We want to impress girls and we don’t know how to do it

Is it ok if a girl doesn’t do her hair and makeup?

YES! (is it okay we don’t??)

What does a girl need to do to get noticed?

Be yourself, talk, and wear good perfume. Be outgoing.

Are guys as worried about their looks as girls are?

No. We don’t wear make-up and we shave our heads.

Do guys have a problem with girls driving?

No, if you don’t crash or multi-task.

Do guys always want to pay on a date or do they think they have to? What about the King of Hearts Dance?

We think we have to pay. It doesn’t seem like a date if you split the cost. For King of Hearts, it should be on an individual basis – talk about it.

Why do guys use girls sexually? Why do guys like girls who dress provocatively?

It is genetics – physical appearance is more important to guys than girls.

Do guys realize when girls are two-faced?

Yes! And we dislike it. With a fiery passion.

What are guys’ biggest worry when impressing girls? What do guys think impresses a girl?

Rejection or failure.
Guys trying to be funny and strong (macho).

Are guys interested in a relationship or just dating?

Depends on the guy and the girl. It’s high school. Its not life or death.

How would guys feel about a girl asking them out? Does it bother guys if a girl calls? What’s the biggest turn off that a girl can do?

Awesome, fine.
No, unless it’s repetitive and/or late at night.
Bad smell, high pitched voice, two personalities, manipulative/melodramatic

Why do guys like girl on girl action?

Because its hot and 2x the fun.

Yee-Haw!

2008-02-10T00:00:00.001-06:00

We had Country-Western Family night at the church and I thought I'd play the part nicely... fit right in with the kids during line dancing! Like the pigtails? This is part of a new ministry to get families involved with one another in their home vocations.

Enjoy the photos!

Joy

2008-02-08T00:07:00.000-06:00

My dear Jeni Falkman was proposed to this evening by her Colin Grangaard.
From what I understand, she said yes...!

This is a coupling of two best friends and their marriage will be a blessing not only for them, but for all of us surrounding them.

Cheers to Colin and to my Sister From Another Mister!

Jeni on the first day of seminary (2003)

My sister from another Mister

Jeni and Colin

p.s. Jeni - I hope you don't mind I jacked two out of three pics from your Facebook. I didn't have a copy of our twin pics! Do you have it??

Yael Naim - New Soul

2008-02-08T00:05:00.001-06:00

It is a beautiful Israel singer named Yael Naim singing her "New Soul." I think there are a number of really beautiful theological/blessing images in there. If you need to
read the lyrics alongside go to this site:

http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/y/yael_naim/new_soul.html

One of the ways I understand the life of faith is that we are simply
getting used to our new bodies of freedom, gifted to us by God. When you are captured in His promises, it is not so much that sin is taken from you, but that you are taken out of sin. You are a "new soul"
trying to find your way in this world, no longer claimed by sin, death, and the devil.

Utterly delightful. If you like Naim, check it her CD on iTunes and you can find the rest of her work with lots of her music in Hebrit.
Hope you enjoy! I thought you might appreciate it.

Yes, yes, it is definitely chickie muzak as my dear friend Jake would say! I may not be as music savvy as my dear Jeni Falkman is - and my powers of description fade in comparison (Jeni, would you like to write something here? - I won't pay you, but you can have the publicity!). And yes, I know this is popular and somewhat kitschy as a result. But I'm in love and I thought you could fall into the joy alongside me.

Cheers!

The Wisdom of Pat

2008-02-04T19:51:00.000-06:00

Pat is my dear parishioner who is not only struggling with Alzheimers', but after his recent kidney operation, the doctors discovered he has six months or less to live due to end-stage malignant, malicious body-wide cancer. I visited him this evening and was so glad to have worn my collar because he recognized the office immediately. He held on to my hand and did not let go. I gave him a little back rub and he kept making sounds of relaxation - thank God for touch!

I am posting this not only to ask for prayers for him, but also to share one of the most insightful quips of the week:

Pat's Wife: Okay, Pat. You behave yourself for the nurses!
Pat: Why?

Valparainsnow Windyana

2008-01-24T15:28:00.000-06:00

I have no photo elements to todays post, but it has been a bit too long and I thought it would be a good time to post.

Jerry seems to think I may make it through an entire year without ever having to do a funeral. He might be right - and even though the practice may be good, I'd rather do mock-ups with a plastic dolly than play with the fates of the people here. But I've become concerned at the prospects now that we are barreling into February. Apparently people stick it out through the holidays and then choose January to become ill. Colon cancer appears to be the most popular choice. Some of it may be conscious, some of it not. But it seems that quite a few bodies have declared all out war on their owners.

When I first arrived here in Valparaiso (often referred by yocals as the "Vale of Paradise") I did the obligatory round of visits. Hospitals, shut-ins, and my beloved nursing homes. Of course I believe visitation is a good and necessary part of ministry. All Christians, with or without a seminary education, are called to pick up the mantle of ministry and visit the homebound and infirm. There is no two bones about it: human contact makes the healing - or even the dying - a little less lonely. But as the year progresses there is something much less rote about the visits. There is not the sense that I am simply going to sit by a bedside, listen and hold a hand, then say a prayer and hand over the Gospel, then go home to a nice cup of tea.

Now, I know these people. Their faces follow me home and invade my personal prayer time. There is magnetism that draws me back to the hospital without the instructions from Jerry to go. There is a lot of pain to see these dear people hurt and cry. The prayers become closer and less like a preplanned laundry list - and sometimes I have to choke down and act like the staid Norwegian I'm not.

My dear Vickie is in the hospital. And Pat... and Weivel... Witey... Gary... Crystal... Dan... Bob... and Lois. Roger is still busy dying and Dolores is still there with him. I hate that. I hate that these bodies are revolting against the dear people I love and making it difficult to visit and pray.

Ministry is nothing like a 9-5. I take the "work" home and to my bedside and am still unsure how to "leave it at church." Much of me does not care to leave it at church because to do so would seem so callous. There is something comforting about telling Vickie that I was thinking about her yesterday - and really having done it - and wishing there were something supernatural about that. Perhaps some of her pain was somehow taken because of it. I know science doesn't work that way - but wouldn't it be great if it did?

I was studying scripture this morning and came across this Psalm (27) and thought it be a good rallying cry for these sicknesses that seems to be all-consuming. Not only does it address the evil that seeks to devour (the cancer...diabetes... Alzheimer's... etc.) but it puts some confidence in the hearer about what will happen to the attacker. It relates well to this weeks' Gospel text where Jesus says "follow me" (Mt 3:12-24). Many preachers this Sunday will try to preach this as an invitation but I think it ought to be preached as a command: "No really... follow me... I'm not kidding... Oh? You think you have a choice?" It is Jesus who wills that you trust God is interested in and cares about kicking all these illnesses into the ground (being cancer to the cancer, chemo to the chemo, and finally death to death). And it is God's strength that will provide the unimaginable trust necessary to get my dear parishioners and friends through their treatments, surgeries, stays in bed and anything else that comes

So get busy reading this Psalm - it will help you learn to thumb you nose at the devil. "Oh really Satan... and WHOM shall I fear?? Certainly not YOU! My God is advancing against anything you put in my path and you will never win." And then in the good words of Luther for those struggling with colon cancer and other illnesses, turn and fart in the devils' face. Because it is in the good and holy work of breaking wind that will not only drive the devil away, but make him afraid because already the cancerous bowels are returning to health and life - Ha!

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Psalm 27
(Of David)
1 The LORD is my light and my salvation—
      whom shall I fear?
      The LORD is the stronghold of my life—
      of whom shall I be afraid?

2 When evil men advance against me
      to devour my flesh, [a]
      when my enemies and my foes attack me,
      they will stumble and fall.

3 Though an army besiege me,
      my heart will not fear;
      though war break out against me,
      even then will I be confident.

4 One thing I ask of the LORD,
      this is what I seek:
      that I may dwell in the house of the LORD
      all the days of my life,
      to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD
      and to seek him in his temple.

5 For in the day of trouble
      he will keep me safe in his dwelling;
      he will hide me in the shelter of his tabernacle
      and set me high upon a rock.

6 Then my head will be exalted
      above the enemies who surround me;
      at his tabernacle will I sacrifice with shouts of joy;
      I will sing and make music to the LORD.

7 Hear my voice when I call, O LORD;
      be merciful to me and answer me.

8 My heart says of you, "Seek his [b] face!"
      Your face, LORD, I will seek.

9 Do not hide your face from me,
      do not turn your servant away in anger;
      you have been my helper.
      Do not reject me or forsake me,
      O God my Savior.

10 Though my father and mother forsake me,
      the LORD will receive me.

11 Teach me your way, O LORD;
      lead me in a straight path
      because of my oppressors.

12 Do not turn me over to the desire of my foes,
      for false witnesses rise up against me,
      breathing out violence.

13 I am still confident of this:
      I will see the goodness of the LORD
      in the land of the living.

14 Wait for the LORD;
      be strong and take heart
      and wait for the LORD.

Trip Home to Minneapolis-St. Paul

2008-01-14T18:53:00.000-06:00

I know, I know. Too many pictures, too little writing. But this will be the last big photo run I will post for awhile. Don't get me wrong: I'll post. Just not with gobs of photos. There are lots of you who will appear here, so I hope you enjoy your blog debuts - and for some of you, return appearances!

On my first stop after staying at the Parker Plaza (Yes, only the trendiest of Hotels on the Sandgren Strip) I turned south on 35 only to stop in Northfield to visit my dear friends, the Pleuss-Nelson family! "Family" used to consist of the happily married Jessica and Andy until just about two weeks ago when Simon finally joined in the fun! Jess endured many hours of labor until 8lb12oz Simon Jacob arrived. Wow. A lot of power for one slender lady!

Baby Simon yawning

Baby Simon doing a "One-Eyed Jack"

The best gift Simon will ever have: Andy and Jess as his Mama and Daddy

Happy Daddy! Simon has his nose!

Happy Mama!

Now it is on to the next stop: a visit to friend Pastor Jason Burggraff in Sioux Falls, SD!

His new house - can you see Burgge playing cello in the front window?

Jason at... you guess it: SIOUX FALLS!

The Right Reverend in the Good Lords' nave

Jason and his buddy Alex

Back to the Sem for MID-WINTER CONVOCATION! Somewhere between Rolf Jacobson questioning whether he was the academician or eye-candy (as opposed to Dave-O Lose) and late night beer runs to Ole Chicago's, I found myself elevated to the 9th levels of paradise. But of course, as a Lutheran, I felt a little guilty about the great time I was having and translated a Greek text for recompense.

A beautiful snowy evening at Luther

Carleton and Kris

Paula and David smiling like it is their 8th grade prom photo
(and they think its funny to do it every time you try to take their picture!)

Stewbert and Natalie
(can you believe how incredible he looks?!)

Stew, may I please have your top Concord responses to this question:
What is Natalie doing in the above photo?
(p.s. for all of you readers who might not have witness the glory of my lactose intolerance, no, I am not 5 months pregnant!)

Stew making smooth moves on Necia

For those of you who have never experienced the sheer joy of Carl's laugh...
The only point of this clip is for you to hear him laugh!

A big Carleton hug!

Nat, Jason, Carl, and John Karl Ahola (he loves pureed Mac'n'Cheese with a pretzel chaser)

David and Paula with a real smile!

Friday table talk with Uncle Roy and Aunt Norma:

Uncle Roy explaining the difference between the capital and lower case 'E'
**for an incredibly funny photo of Uncle Roy, feel free to email me - I've got one that is "unpostable"!)

The "Last Lunch" with David and Paula at Old Chicago's. Thai Pie anyone??

Having to deal with their revolting displays of affections...
After Paula attends her 2-week J-term on the Pine Ridge Indian reservation I expect she will be making eyes at the earth, wearing beads, and falsifying native traditions with her ROLO friends.

Supper at Michael and Katherine's!

Katherine always sets out the special red plate - It makes me feel so good!

The 5-Star chef - She made a REALLY yummy chicken dish with quinoa and sesamed asparagus stalks!! Wow! Katherine and Michael made the tiramisu together.

Katherine and Michael at the witching hour before I left

A Very Temperate Christmas

2008-01-05T12:13:00.000-06:00

Soon I will add some text, but while I am busy putting away all of things from Christmas travels, I thought I'd add a small album of celebration photos. I hope your Christmas was as delightful and full of joy as mine!

Christmas at Uncle Johns' in Michigan. The tree, hearth, table, and everything about the setting was perfect. I am so lucky to have family like this! I woke up to my excited little cousins, received a very helpful explanation about the nature, use, and value of "Webkinz" from my youngest cousin, Julia, watched my Uncle set up the Polly Pockets racing set... so many fun toys to play with! One of the highlights was a framed pastel drawing my cousin Ellen made for Uncle John of Jack at The Cottage. She is very talented and this is just a taste of more to come from her!

Cousin Jack is a particularly lovely Christmas present...!

Cousin Ellen and I showing off our matching stitches!

Cousins Emma, Kim, and Julia

Ellen lighting the candles at the table

My dear Grandma looking especially beautiful this Christmas

Emma and Julia regaling us with carols

Cooper taking a long winters' nap

The whole family gathered for the karaoke version of Guitar Hero -until you have seen your Grandma sing Coldplay and "Love Shack," you haven't lived...!

Catching up with NEWLY APPROVED PASTOR KELSAY PARKER and her husband Dave in their swanky Coopermobile!

On To Virginia:
I'm not so sure people should be allowed to have this much fun over Christmas vacation! I had a wonderful time with Mom, Dad, Brothers, and Grandma, as well as caught up with dear friends from both High School and Grad School!

A day back at Christ Lutheran, Fairfax:

Preaching on 30. Dec

Grandma and the boys in the pews
There is a baby boom at our church!

Monica with her daughter Cassandra and new baby Emma
New members with their baby twins!

Alice
Judy and Lynn Boerger (I really missed their Christmas party this year)

A sleepover with Stephanie Johnson:

Pastor Johnson looking cheery in her Christmas reds,
drinking rich, tasty Stephanie-made Hot Cocoa!

The most comfortable bed I slept in throughout the entire vacation, exclusively from Spa Stephanie!

Pastor Johnson in her church sanctuary!

Family Tradition: New Years at Esposito's!
Calamari's, the boys' eating pizza, red and white house wine, marinated carrot salad, and the 60 year old Italian waitress/owner hitting on Dad...!

Neighbors Karen and Bill

The boys looking very manly for the New Year

Cindy and I

Jonathan!

Derek!

Grandma!

High school friend Jake and I headed to the Italian Embassy for New Years!

Bill and Pat Rodio
Pat has been my self-appointed boyfriend since 2nd grade. Whenever he has met a date of mine he always grabs them by the arm or the collar (whichever is closer) and says, "she's mine - hurt her and I'll break your knees!" Nothing like a good mafia connection to keep the neighborhood chicks safe...!

Mr. Rodio reading his hand-written and very funny poem!
I will try to procure it for you, dear reader

At home on New Years Day:
We always have a bowl of Dad's special Mushroom-Artichoke Soup and this year he also made wings and baked brie - yum!

Derek and I celebrating

The whole family with their wings!

Our family Christmas tree

Back to Michigan...

The Sidetrack: #1 Hamburger in the country, according to GQ

A Winter Wonderland

A Very Valpo Christmas

2007-12-28T00:28:00.000-06:00

Below is a compilation of nominal chronology during this 2007 Christmas season. I could not have asked for a more full or more delightful Christmas celebration. So far it has been 2 weeks of sheer bliss - and it keeps getting better! I hope you enjoy this small montage:

Youth Director, Erin and I celebrating the return of the College Students at our pizza party. We were able to have a beer because alas, no students showed up. So we simply toasted them (and Tammy!)

A remedial photo entry - my dear 8th Grade Confirmation class on my birthday (at the end of November). They make me look forward to every moment of my Wednesday evening! No only do they teach me, but they are just so lively and full of questions and interesting ideas!

Our big 12" snowstorm on top of the previous 5"! For the first time in Jerry's 28 years at XLC, church was cancelled. There is certainly cause for concern when your plowing company becomes terribly stuck in the parking lot and had to call for help. I believe it was an act of divine intervention; God ensuring the hearers of the Word would not suffer my sermon! This is the view from my flat!

A few friends from XLC:

Karen Tiebert Dottie and Irv Olson

Dorothy Maddox Betty Luckett

The Christmas Pageant:

What you do not see here is when Joseph handed Mary the baby Jesus by the head. Very touching!

My favorite video clip!
"I Just Wanna Be A Sheep - bah bahbah bah!"

Little Luke rockin' out to "Away in the Manger"

The Pre-K and Kindergarten classes singing "Mary Had A Baby," in the marvelous style of "shout" music!

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Christmas Partying at the Castleman home! My supervisor Jerry is on the right (back) and his wife Claudia is opposite at the left end. Her mother is on the left in the front row. All of these people have been gathering annually for nearly two decades throughout all of the changes in family and church! And they make a mean Swedish meatball with green bean casserole...!

Advent and Christmas wall hangings!

The church sanctuary looking lovely and dimmed on Christmas Eve. Jerry hit the ball out of the park with a beautiful and reflective sermon about the gifts we have and those unexpected gifts God adds to us beyond those things we can imagine! I left those services not only being excited about the gifts here and those to come, but also fully prepared and excited for the coming of Jesus. Many thanks to Jerry!

I hope everyone had a very merry Christmas - that Father Christmas was very good to you and that you were surrounded by the love and peace of your family and friends!

Christmas Eve Welcome

2007-12-25T13:08:00.000-06:00

Good Evening!

Grace and Peace to you from God our Father and our Lord and Savior Jesus the Christ.

Why are we gathered here this evening?

You look so cheery in your reds and greens, standing close with your friends and family! We gather here in hope tonight. We gather in hope that tomorrow will bring laughter and delight, a tasty supper, and the comforts of home.

But we are also gathered tonight in a new kind of hope; a hope that shines from the stables of the Middle Eastern countryside, in Bethlehem.

Jesus Christ is coming to you. Your dear Heavenly Father loves you so much this night that He calls your attention to a baby wrapped in swaddling clothes in a manger. This is the child that, as Martin Luther once said, is laid in the manger of the prophets of the Old Testament. The one coming of whom we sing and praise tonight is the promised baby born so that you do you not fear God’s presence in the world, but welcome Him with soft arms and gentle words.

God has come to place Himself in your hands, so that you will know love, and trust in Him above all things.

He comes so the dark places of your heart and the worries of this world will pass away and be no more.

The darkness has seen a great light!
Jesus Christ, Son of God, is born today for you!

The Twelve Days of Internship

2007-12-24T01:06:00.000-06:00

This goes out to all of you who know what it is to be an intern on Christmas. Word.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

On the first day of Christmas my pastor gave to me:
Luther and a love for t.v.

On the second day of Christmas my pastor gave to me:
Two dirty cassocks

On the third day of Christmas my pastor gave to me:
Three hours of sleep

On the fourth day of Christmas my pastor gave to me:
Four evaluations

On the fifth day of Christmas my pastor gave to me:
A long, boring sermon!

On the sixth day of Christmas my pastor gave to me:
Six Bible studies

On the seventh day of Christmas my pastor gave to me:
Seven Advent greenings

On the eighth day of Christmas my pastor gave to me:
Eight bad translations

On the ninth day of Christmas my pastor gave to me:
Nine cranky elders

On the tenth day of Christmas my pastor gave to me:
Ten pounds of fruitcake

On the eleventh day of Christmas my pastor gave to me:
Eleven hours a-visiting

On the twelfth day of Christmas my pastor gave to me:
Twelve committee meetings

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*note: this creative work of Christmas cheer in no way necessarily reflects the views of the author in regard to her pastor, who is kind and helpful in the ways a supervisor ought to be.

He'll Say Are You Married, We'll Say "No Man!"

2007-12-12T14:25:00.000-06:00

I received my very first proposal of marriage yesterday. I was duly informed that 10-year old John Henry would like for me to wait for him.

For Good Cheer

2007-12-11T14:15:00.000-06:00

Dearest Friends,

My brothers and I would like to send you holiday greetings in style.
Click on this link:

http://www.elfyourself.com/?id=1308150356

and a note from my Dear Dad:

http://www.scroogeyourself.com/?id=1308739539

Merry Christmas!

Love,
Natalie, Derek, and Jonathan Gessert

p.s. An addendum from my Mom and her co-worker Sandi:

http://www.elfyourself.com/?id=1319510440

Kiddoes Confirmation Questions

2007-12-06T16:40:00.000-06:00

These kids are smart cookies. There is just no two ways around it. Here are the questions turned in yesterday (be prepared... some of them are veritable novelettes):

1. Why doesn't God show His answers to our questions in "flesh" or in more simple forms? Why doesn't HE answer our questions sometimes? (I want to know too...)

2. Hi, I have a long question. I was thinking of going to a different religion when I'm done being confermed. I have a Nana and a Papa that are deeply pious. And I asked my Mom if they would hate me if I even told them about it and she said yes. And they would say I would go to hell. So, if I don't believe in hell and they say I'm goin there, it doesn't really matter because I don't believe in hell, so why do they bother saying it if I don't believe in it and that's all that matters? Consult me when you're done with the answer or if you need help understanding it. (Lets not mince words, shall we?...)

3. What does this sign mean? I've seen it everywhere after I read this book. (I'm not sure which book she is talking about, but the sign is circle with a symmetrical cross in the center)

4. If you pray silently, like in your head, will God still hear you?

5. If God doesn't want us to hate anyone, then should we hate the Devil and why?

6. I was wondering if you read a book that went slightly against the Bible would it be bad to read that? I don't believe it, but is it right to read it? It is the "Golden Compass" and the "Subtle Knife." They are good books though - they are interesting.

7. I think that God, portrayed by Pastor is really hardcore on everyone. Like we'll go to hell if we're not exactly not perfect Christians. And I'm worried about that. (Yowza. I'm not so sure he is hearing what the pastor means... I never hear him being really down on people and I am pretty cued into hearing that type of thing... I'm wondering what he's worried about...)

Pretty tough and pretty personal questions. Any suggestions from blogland?

Tis' The Season: Buy Indulgence, Get One Free!

2007-12-06T11:42:00.000-06:00

(Cut and Pasted from BBC.com)

Pope approves Lourdes indulgences

Pope Benedict XVI places great importance on indulgences

Pope Benedict XVI has authorised special indulgences to mark the 150th anniversary of the Virgin Mary's reputed appearance at Lourdes.

Catholics visiting the site within a year of 8 December will be able to receive an indulgence, which the Church teaches can reduce time in purgatory.

Lourdes has drawn pilgrims since Mary was said to have appeared in 1858 to shepherdess Bernadette Soubirous.

The waters of the French shrine are said to have miraculous healing powers.

INDULGENCES AND PURGATORY

A plenary indulgence offers full pardon of the temporal punishment (suffering in this life or the next) due to sins already forgiven in confession

Purgatory is a kind of spiritual waiting room - for people who do not go directly to paradise or hell after death - to purify souls of residual sin before they enter heaven

The Pope is expected to visit the shrine next year.

The pontiff also said believers who prayed at places of worship dedicated to Our Lady of Lourdes from 2-11 February next year - or who were unable to make the journey - would also be able to receive indulgences.

The decree was signed by US Cardinal J Francis Stafford, who is head of the Apostolic Penitentiary, a Vatican court dealing with indulgences and matters of conscience.

Indulgences became infamous in the 16th century for being sold rather than earned, helping, historians say, trigger the Protestant reformation.

While some might consider indulgences an outdated concept, great spiritual importance have been assigned to them by Benedict XVI and his predecessor, Pope John Paul II.

Hoosier Daddy?

2007-12-03T12:21:00.000-06:00

I found a site that may endanger your commitment to procrastinating no longer...

MyHeritage.com will analyze your face in reference to celebrities as well as family members. According to the site I look 26% more like my mother than my father - news to me! Many people used to ask about my adoption status when I was younger and seen with my black-haired, brown-eyed mother. I only wish my fifth grade orthodontist, Dr. Salzburg were still around - then he would know I am definitely not adopted, thank you very much!

As for celebrity listings, I can heartily recommend ANY site believing I look 75% like Jessica Biel... (however, I cannot vouch for the likeness to actress Woranuch Wongsawan...)

Vicar Goes To Staff Meeting

2007-11-29T11:55:00.001-06:00

Thursday is always a day of great anticipation. Exciting things seem to happen on Thursdays; Morning gym time, seniors meeting, Mens' Bible study, class preparation, The Office and Scrubs with a glass of red wine...

But today brought a different Thursday flavor. Pastor Jerry decided to introduce "Staff To Go Over Impending Sermon Thursdays." This has been the highlight of the week. We met and had a discussion that went analogously like this:

Person A: Do you like butterflies?
Person B: No, red sweaters frighten me.
Person C: My Auntie Bertha hated turkey.
Person D: It's true - I heard Denzel Washington said so.
Person B: So what is the problem with global warming?
Person C: I've used Crest toothpaste since I was a child!
Person A: Why do you disdain Harry Wendt so much?
Person B: I don't disdain Wendt. I disdain ice cream - lactose intolerance.
Person D: Oh look! There goes Ms. Olson.

And every time you *think* it is time to stand up and say your goodbyes... nope! Just kidding! Yes, yes, yes, yes... ahhhh... no.

This small clip, after whom the blog is named, is a tribute to my staff meeting experience. I won't tell you who is who... but you can make guesses as to the characters involved. In addition, focus only on the times when the entire council/staff meets... the in between times parallel nothing happening in Valpo presently.

I must say, however, this beautiful Thursday morning ended well with an extended discussion with Ms. Olson regarding her extensive and colorful bowel troubles.
Apropos indeed.

Turkey Time

2007-11-27T18:37:00.000-06:00

Thanksgiving 2007 was best I can remember!
Hanging out with the family was so much fun! Here are a few fun pictures:

Cousin Jack #12, taking names with the Compuware Team

Birthday Cake!
Mom always picks the pretty ones with flowers.
Cake is never worth eating without the frosting...

My brother Jonathan and I - he's 6'6" now!

Dad and I

Group Photo!
Mom and Dad had a great time!

Surprised at how amazing the frosting is?
Not me! Mom is the BEST!

Mom and Dad gave me a WHOLE JAR of capers!
(and some pretty earrings!)

Jonathan and cousin Ellen out for a night on the town

Cousin Julia was a mouse in the Nutcracker!
She was wonderful and even had a solo!

Grandma and I post-tuck in at the Sidetrack in Ypsi.
Ypsi makes us Tipsy!
(we weren't actually tipsy - its just fun to say!)

Not pictured:

- The most tender and delicious turkey cooked by one Mrs. Carol Strom
- Side dishes, including mashed sweet potatoes, bacon-topped stuffing (because everything is better with bacon), broccoli, rolls, squash bisque, shrimp cocktail, fruit platters, baked root veggies, and GRANDMA'S MASHED POTATOES!
- All of the times my brother and I were tackled, whacked, tickled, thumped, wrestled, twisted, hugged, and dragged by our little cousins!
- Sitting with the head coach of the Detroit Redwings during cousin Jack's hockey game! Go Wings!
- Sleeping arrangements at Grandma - poor Mom and Dad sleeping on a mattress that looks something like this: \_/
- All of the other yummy food and great conversation we enjoyed all weekend long!
- All of the really sweet hugs, laughs, and kind words exchanged among everyone

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

A Word from the Picket

2007-11-18T21:20:00.000-06:00

The Writers Guild of America has been on strike since early November, causing major disruptions in the daily diet of popular late night comedy, soon to level the pre-recorded sitcom phenomenon. As you might have guessed, this strike has caused those of menial authority and local notoriety to overestimate their personal talents taken for granted by the fickle public, resulting in Miss Natalie Gessert, Vicar of Valpo, to strike from the blogosphere until her royalties are duly paid in full.

Unfortunately, for Miss Gessert, we at the Democratic National Offices have caught her on camera far from passionate picketing and engaging in suspicious activities which may interest the House Committee on Un-Republican Activities, or HCURA. As you might now, Mr. Cheney is not the only one who has advance Intelligence and Risk Assessment technologies. We have the environment on our side and the whole animal kingdom has been bugged accordingly.

The following photographic record documents the covert environmental activities of Miss Gessert:

Assessing the premises for onlookers and cameras

Finding none, she proceeds in a most un-Republican display of arborial affection

A kiss-and-run, as it were

She believes she has been spotted and makes a run for it

Yet again, with a false sense of security.
The dogwood is the next sufferer of this covert environmentalist rampage

Warned about the Democratic paparazzi combing the region.
Eying with concern...

Not even the dogwoods can save you now, sweetheart...

Such activities will not go without documentation.
You know, Miss Gessert, we are certain the Republican party has Pat Robertson-sponsored church programs to de-environmentalize you. They are always there to help in the de-greening process.

Just note that Hillary will always be there with open arms...
waiting...
waiting...

Update

2007-11-16T13:01:00.000-06:00

I'm so sorry about the lapse in blogging! I will be posting later on tonight. The past two weeks have been absolutely packed. It has nothing to do with my grief regarding the Colbert candidacy...

Thanks for your patience!

A Day After A Day of Mourning

2007-11-07T13:16:00.001-06:00

To my dear readers:

It is with great sadness and regret that I inform you Stephen Colbert has been forced to drop his run for the U.S. Presidency in 2008. He was pushed out by Democratic party officials in a bid to appear on the primary ballot by a vote of 13-3.

And here I thought I could actually vote for a Democrat...

However, in a diplomat effort to revamp the Colbert Campaign and encourage its continuing strength, I hereby name myself the 1,000,001st in the "1,000,000 Strong for Stephen Colbert."
You should too. For the sake of America.

So, if you want Natalie to vote Democrat for the first time in her life, join the campaign. 1,000,000 Strong for Stephen Colbert. I'll do it if you will.

Signed,

Jeni's Favorite Republican

Faith Around the Hearth

2007-11-06T11:44:00.001-06:00

As the year presses on I'm finding that church life is less about attachment to a church building, but more about meeting others in the middle of life. Faith in Chris happens more at the supper table, at work, and in school than a few hours on Sunday. I, myself, feel more able to call on hands above to lean on in my little apartment late at night than during Sunday worship.

One notable frustration I have about church life here in Valparaiso (and certainly not limited geographically) is that the faith is negligible in the most important places life is found: at Work and in the Home. I believe that the work of ministry is to flood others with the Gospel - News so Good that is must be taken back into the intersections of life where goodness is most often experienced. My hope is that the little ones of the church are given homes reflective of what I hope they find at church: responsible, loving care offered by adults who model this behavior towards one another. The hope of most people for our little ones is that they are provided with all of the good things they need in life - food, clothes, home, family, daily work, and all they need from day to day. Interestingly enough, Jesus commands us - even adults - to have faith like a child, so that it becomes the joy of the church to also ensure that these same needs are being met for "grown-ups."

As far as I can see, the best word I can think of for this sort of saturation with care and concern in the name of our common faith is verbal in nature (Lutherans have always been into Verbs... comes with the territory). I see the role of the church as: To Invade

Now, I cannot quite think of another English word that conveys the relationship between church and the home. While the word is so unfortunately often associated with military tactics and hostility, what about rejoining it with images of yeast in bread. Or the pervasive joy a newborn brings to her home. Or the way snow comes to gently blanket our communities a few times a year. Those, to me, are "good" and welcomed invasions. They are gifts dropped upon us without us asking or even knowing quite how it happens. So I look to our role as the church to find good and healthy ways to invade the home, saturating every corner of the faith life with goodness, love, and hope. A tall order, yes. Impossible - well, God doesn't seem to think so. And He says its His job anyway to take care of it, so I guess its not out of the realm of possibility.

Anyhow. Part of the reason why I was thinking about the church and its need to saturate the whole home and life has to do with the Catechism. In Luther's day he had large posterboards made up with the commandments, Apostles Creed, and Lord's prayer on it so that the Mom's and Dad's could teach one another and their children all about the promises of God in matters of life, death, and relationships. Maybe its not the norm for modern living, but I can't help but think it is a pretty good idea. Instead of simply sending the kiddoes off to Sunday School to "get them some morals," it is helpful to have those lessons and gifts invade the whole of life - life at the crossroads of the supper table. I was reminded of this because a friend of mine, Edith Gage, has come up with a really beautiful way of bringing the Apostles Creed into the home:

She did this with her own hands! I had the good pleasure of seeing this process unfold over a few months. This piece is the Apostles Creed surrounded by Luther's explanations to the articles. This is not lofty, heady theological discourse, but rather the sort of dinner table discussion to bring into your kitchen. This is meant to be graspable by all and enjoyed as a centerpiece in discussion about the clarity of God's gifts and promises available at all times and in all places.

I'm not really into using this space as advertising (Blogs should give us some relief from that world, shouldn't they?), but Edith's work is really wonderful and I would encourage you to think about bringing one of her pieces home. Her work is very price-manageable and high quality. If you are interested, contact her at:

Edith Gage
Engaging Faith
Exploring the intersection of faith and art
egage001@luthersem.edu
(651) 645-7007

Green and White, My Hearts' Delight

2007-11-03T18:34:00.001-05:00

It's okay, Michigan State.
We both know you are the real winners.

On the banks of the Red Cedar
Is a school that's known to all;
Its specialty is winning,
And those Spartans play good ball;
Spartan teams are never beaten,
All through the games they fight;
Fight for the only colors,
Green and White.
Go right thru' for MSU,
Watch the points keep growing.
Spartan teams are bound to win,
They're fighting with a vim.
RAH! RAH! RAH!
See their team is weakening,
We're going to win this game.
Fight! Fight! Rah! Team, Fight!
Victory for MSU.

It's Not What You Think, Ocifer...

2007-11-02T14:57:00.000-05:00

I was pulled over at 3:01 a.m., 31. October, in Eau Claire, Wisconsin. Hard to believe, I know, but occasionally it happens. This is lucky #3 for me and my diverse driving career and its currently one for three in terms of getting an actual ticket. TPR Officer K. Devries is the name on my traffic warning and I'd just like to take this moment to share with you, dear reader, what a fine police officer this man is.

While of course being pulled over is one of those life events we might like to avoid (and indeed, my heart was beating into my throat at the time), this officer made a beeline for me with a smile and a helpful concern regarding my front right headlight. It seems Officer Devries has not yet become so disillusioned by matters of the law that he has booked a cell at his local seminary for more Gospel-related citations...

During preschool the police officers usually make a visit in their subdued blues with shiny badges, sounding the siren for excited little ones who clamp their hands firmly over their ears. Each receive a little plastic sheriffs badge and the little boys begin to dream about their future in the squad, anxious to rid the world of crime with the other superheroes in blue. They will, of course, feel the same urgency when the men in red show up to put out fires, but there is something romantic and death-defying about doing the grunt work of public protection. Policemen and women are the ones we all want to trust to keep us safe and free from the dangers our neighbor or strangers might seek to inflict upon us. Officer K. Devries reminded me of that the other night - that old sense of trust and confidence I felt in preschool: that there is indeed someone strong and kind who has the wherewithal to keep common folks like me safe in day to day matters.

So if you are out late one night, driving in an unfortunate state of padiddlement, just hope its Officer K. Devries at your service.
He's one of the good guys.

Joined at the...

2007-11-01T20:22:00.000-05:00

If:
Jennifer + Benjamin = Bennifer
and
Barry + Marney = Barney
does
Jim + Pamela = Jamela?

Omega's Come in Threes

2007-10-29T20:32:00.000-05:00

Tonight I am swimming in a sea of tasty Omega-3 Fatty Acids!

Courtesy of Trader Joe's, the most wonderful place in the U.S. for all your food-related needs, I purchased some Wild Alaskan Sock-eye Salmon. Was it ever wild! Low in mercury and high in nutrition, few supper's can compare. The only thing missing was a side of brussels sprouts.

Thick red, tender, slippery meat, silvery backs and dense with oil... I broiled two pieces rare in sesame seed and olive oil with garlic and capers. Three minutes of preparation yielded buttery pieces of heaven.

I just wanted to share with you how exciting a simple piece of salmon can be.
Many thanks to the fish who gave its life for the sake of this entry...

To search for all your Trader Joe's needs, please see: http://www.traderjoes.com/index.html

Reformers Wear Red

2007-10-26T11:08:00.000-05:00

While the rest of the world dons orange and black with visions of candy corn awaiting eager little hands, Lutherans like me tend ignore the revelry in deference to Reformation Day. Not that Lutherans have any particular beef with Halloween - it is just as good as any day to enjoy friendly neighbors and tasty treats! But why worry about Halloween when one can wrap oneself in costume ribbons of merry, cherry, Reformation Red and go Reformation-Treating by knocking on doors and singing in frighteningly good four-part harmony "A Mighty Fortress Is Our God"? Reformation Day serves two purposes for us band of merry men. The first reason, is to delight in fellowship with one another. Reformation Day is indeed a cultural holiday! Since the Reformation occurred in the heart of Germany, may I suggest a heart-healthy celebration including the following menu items:

- Bratwurst with Brötchen and Mustard
- Glühwein
(A curiously warm, sweetened and herbed red wine. Don't drink to much or you'll see the visions of Ezekiel!)
- Beer. Thick, hearty lagers and stout.
- Dumplings. Any kind. There is never a day that is not good for a dumpling.
- Cheese
- Whole roasted hog with apple in mouth
- Cabbage (Kraut) steamed with apple slices
(red cabbage has more antioxidants and fussy eaters may like the sweetness of Rotkohl)
- Sweet apple desserts with raisins

Reformation Day in Lutherstadt-Wittenberg, 2005

In the fair city of Lutherstadt-Wittenberg a celebration takes place annually in the Reformation tradition of eating, drinking, singing, enjoying art and dancing, storytelling, and the seemingly discarded and lost art of theological disputation. When a Lutheran is on stage, the whole world laughs, as though from earth below to heaven we went. Reformation is often acknowledged as a grand cultural extravaganza, as if recognizing that on October 31st everyone gets to be German for a day! And since we are so merry this time of year, let us add lefse to the menu and not forget the joys of fellowship with our Scandinavian brothers and sisters! There is peculiar and comfortable joy in finding common cultural heritage. Back in Wittenberg the cobble stones and crackling air draw celebrateurs close, laughing over steaming mugs of wine and fingering thick yards of medieval felt fabric. There are parades of men in their stockings and velvet regalia, carrying torches to swipe close to the faces of young ones and singe the mustache of the fathers who hold them up to see. Midnight passes and there is no reason to turn in yet - the hog hasn't yet been picked dry! Reformation Day is indeed a good day to be German.

Yet, the second reason for celebrating Reformation Day is the foremost. Reformers don't celebrate to thumb noses at the Roman Catholics. Neither do they gather to revel in sin and other misdeeds as if the holiday were meant to be some sort of antinomian booze cruise. If we meant to celebrate in this way, Lutherans would be viciously trampling on the blood of both the Reformers and those who died in the 30 Years War in a disgusting display of deaths' victory in battle. It is for this reason also that I am kept from nailing a copy of the 95 Theses to the door of the Notre Dame University cathedral, just a few miles away...! Reformation Day is, in its best form, finally meant to serve as a day for confession. Not dry, decrepit recitations of, "oh, I've been a naughty boy, will you ever forgive me?", but instead a clear confession of what we believe as Christians.

Yes, indeed we believe that God is our Father and really into creating and providing for His creation! Yes, we really buy into this Jesus Christ as His Son who died for us to give us life! Oh, and as if that weren't enough, we really get into the notion that God sends His Spirit to be with us, giving us strength outside of ourselves long enough for faithfulness to break into our stony, unbelieving hearts.

What a day to wear red! Reformation is the day when we Christians recognize the duress the church faces, even when 30 Year Wars with the Catholics do not loom in our horizon. Today Christians still recognize that people really aren't into hearing about Jesus because such confessions smack of intolerance and absolute truth claims. Christians confess into the crowds owned by MTV and Oprah, who wonder "how can I live the best life?", and upon hearing about this Jesus, the others feel attacked that the best life occurs from outside of the self. A strange message in our present

And so Reformation Day revelers gather in red for nothing more than a little taste of Easter before our winter hibernation. We gather in the face of opposition and duress; in the face of the those who think [Lutheran] Christianity to be a mess of moralism or lawlessness. We gather in trust that even without bratwurst and wine, there is something to be excited about. While our Halloweening counterparts shroud themselves in zombie costumes and tell scary stories, we Lutherans gather specifically to thumb our noses at the grave. We dance around the charter of freedom Christ has given us, in sure and certain declaration that one day our dear Jesus will call us up out of our rotting graves for something better; death has no final word in this world. There are no spirits to appease, no ghoulies to steal the soul, and no devil to fear. While Luther recognized spirits and demons and the devil indeed exist and are to be feared as those who would attack, when clinging to the Word of God alone, fear dissipates because the grave becomes a laughable thing. The grave is a prison which can never hold those caught up in faith. This is why on Reformation Day we sing with heart and gusto:

The Word they still shall let remain
Nor any thanks have for it;
He's by our side upon the plain
With His good gifts and Spirit.
And take they our life,
Goods, fame, child and wife,
Though life be wrenched away,
They cannot win the day;
The Kingdoms' ours forever.

So, should anyone seek to take our dear possessions - even if life be wrenched away - we confess with boldness, joy, and vigor that those deaths will never have the last word. The Kingdom is ours in the face of death. Those who confess have the promise of resurrection and will rise up to new life. It is this confession and proclamation that brings life and freedom. So, hug a Lutheran today and know the joy of Reformation!
And while you're add it, spread the Word. Go Reformation-treating! Who knows, maybe your neighbor will be moved to keep steadfast in your spirited words and offer up a sweet treat to send you on your way...

Just for fun:
Here are Prayers of the People I wrote in accord with the 10 Commandments.

PRAYERS OF INTERCESSION

[P]astor: Let us pray for the life of the world, the intentions of the faithful, and for any in sorrow or in need.

A brief silence.

P (I am the Lord your God. You shall have no other gods)

We thank you Lord that you are our God and You have made us your people. Send us your Holy Spirit so that we will fear, love, and trust You above all things. Lord, in your mercy,

[C]ongregation Hear our prayer

P (You shall not take the name of the Lord your God in vain)

We thank you that you have given your name to us, that we might pray to you as children speak to their loving Father. We pray that Your name and Your Word be placed in our hearts and on our tongues. We especially ask for your protection today for our dear brothers and sisters in Christ who speak Your Name in the midst of danger and death. Keep us from using your name to curse, swear, lie, or deceive, and help us to always call upon you in prayer, praise, and thanksgiving. Lord, in your mercy,

C Hear our prayer

P (Remember the Sabbath and Keep it holy)

Lord, keep us from neglecting your Word and the preaching of it so that we may regard it as Holy and gladly hear and learn it. We pray today for Christ Lutheran Church and all congregations throughout the world. Please send us trustworthy pastors and leaders who will freely preach your Gospel in our church, at home, and in our daily work. Lord, in your mercy,

C Hear our prayer

P (Honor your father and mother)

We give you thanks, dear Father, that you have given us loving fathers and mothers and others who care for us in all of our daily needs. Make our homes a place of peace and comfort so that we might know your love in our closest relationships. Help us so that we do not despise or anger our parents or others in authority, but respect, love, serve, and obey them. Lord, in your mercy,

C Hear our prayer

P (You shall not kill)

We pray that You continue to breathe life into this world, Lord. Protect us from everything that seeks to take our life; from sickness and diseases, from fractured relationships, and from death and the loss of our loved ones. We ask today that you bring your healing and comfort to these we name before You now[...]. Please protect us from sin, death, and the Devil with all of his empty promises. Keep us from harming our family or neighbor in any way, but give us hands and hearts to help them in all of their physical needs.

C Hear our prayer

P (You shall not commit adultery)

Lord, we ask that you help us honor the promises of marriage and all of the gifts and responsibilities this blessing brings. Please help to remember the promises made to our spouse so that our families might grow in love and trust. In all matters of relationship, keep our words and conduct pure and honorable, so that husband and wife love and respect each other. Lord in your mercy,

C Hear our prayer

P (You shall not steal)

Lord, we recognize our deep longing for the good gifts of this world. Please help us so that we do not take our neighbor’s money or property or get them in any dishonest way. Instead, help us to improve and protect the possessions of others. Give us the ability to recognize the needs of others so that Your good gifts are distributed to all in need of food, water, shelter, and protection. Lord, in your mercy,

C Hear our prayer

P (You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor)

Lord, keep the words of our mouths and the meditations of our hearts from all evil. Help us so that we do no betray, slander, or lie about our neighbors or family, but defend them and speak well of them, and explain their in the kindest way. Lord, in your mercy,

C Hear our prayer

P (You shall not covet your neighbors’ house, wife, husband, workers, cattle, or anything else that is theirs)

Lord, pour us out for the sake of our neighbor so that we help others keep and protect what is theirs. Give us honorable words and conduct so that we do not tempt or coax away our neighbors’ spouse, workers, or possessions, but encourage them to remain loyal. Lord, in your mercy,

C Hear our prayer

P All of these things and whatever else you see that we need, grant us, dear Father. We offer our prayers before you, trusting in your love; through Jesus Christ our Lord,

C Amen.

The Kingdom is ours forever!
Happy Reformation Day!

Confirmation Questions - Week 6

2007-10-25T10:55:00.001-05:00

Our lesson became a muddled effort at explaining law and gospel. Pastor explained how the law is "like when you ride your bike and run into a mailbox and get a scar." Of course this prompted my small group to a great 20-minute comparison of our best scars! I was so impressed because my two quietest kids couldn't wait to show off every death-defying injury they had ever inflicted upon themselves. The one boy who never talks was anxious to tell about five different stories of how he earned gravel in the sides of his legs, face, arms... you name it. Our group decided to name him "Skid," and he is very proud of the new nickname!

Betty and Dan lead the other small group and they have had a tough time lassoing the energy of those kids! While I have seven boys and two girls who need to have discussions pulled out of them with a plier, the other group just won't stop talking. Dan became very irate with the kids when they began talking over Betty. They seem to have an unfortunate grouping of the "popular" kids. There are a few self-proclaimed "Drama Queens," some "Skater Dudes," and then there are the boys who busy themselves trying to catch the attention of one young lady who simply needs to bat her eyes in their direction and they melt into a stuttering puddle. Betty and I suggested that perhaps come January (at the beginning of the new semester), we should try a two month stint of separating the boys and the girls for small group. That way there might not be the competition and attention-getting behavior, as well as the hope for questions and discussions that might not happen in the presence of potential embarrassment in front of the opposite sex.

The Confirmation "Question Ministry" is going very well and, strangely enough, Betty and Dan's group get into it even way more than my own group. Ironically, last week, they had not even discussed Halloween and it was strange and interesting how all of their questions related. Betty told me they were all completely silent when writing their questions on the paper scraps! We ended up having some helpful discussions about what the origins of the holiday were, how it was not intended for "devil worship" (but we did discuss Satanism), and there was also a good discussion about Wicca and pagan worship. I feel tremendously lucky that while I was in college I had a number of dear friends involved in Wicca. They were always open about answering questions and took a lot of the taboo and fear out of their tradition. Furthermore, they were and continue to be dependable, kind, contributing, and bright individuals, certainly not to be feared or avoided. As a result, the discussion we had with the kids was clearly not intended to develop a fear or disgust for those of alternative [pagan] traditions, but to draw up a clear delineation regarding faith and religious practice. The kids are not to be encouraged to practice witchcraft in any way and we pointed out why that is unacceptable in the Christian faith. However, we were also able to point out how those who are involved in Wicca are not to be feared as regarded as anyone less than friends we work or go to school with. Children need to have taboo and fear removed from other faith traditions, because taboo breeds a potent mixture of curiosity and contempt. The confirmation children will certainly meet those involved in pagan worship, whether with children who dabble in it in high school, certainly in college, and is the growing interest of bored housewives. They need to be aware that paganism is not the same tradition as satanism, and still have a clear understanding why Christians cannot participate in pagan ritual or belief because of distinct and opposing beliefs. If anyone is interested in the paperwork I drew up for the class, please let me know!

Here is the list of confirmation questions for Week 6:

1. What was the Garden of Eden?
2. Both on the same page:
- Why is St. Micheal called the Arch engle? [sic]
- Can I really ask anything I want, even if its not about chirch? [sic]
3. If God wants us to live a good, happy life, then why are we put under so much stress and
pain?
(from my dear boy who instigated the farting contest last week during group - but comes every week complaining about how difficult and exhausting school is for him.)
4. What is heaven like after you die?
5. If someone doesn't practice the same religion as you (say their Hindu), does that mean they go to hell?
6. If God created everything (heaven and earth) then where did the Devil come from? And if God created him, why would He?
7. What do you think was the greatest event in the Bible?
8. Where is chocolate in the Bible? Do you like hot cocoa and where did it come from?
(a very important question, don't you think??)
9. Why did you decide to become a pastor? (see candidacy essay for details...)
10. How much food can you eat? (huh?)
11. Is the Bible written in a sequence?

And I saved the three most interesting questions for last:

1. Was the things that people said in the Grate Awakening only to get people to confes there sins? [sic]
(Seriously, what kid asks something like that! What a brilliant question - he's in *8th* grade!)

2. As a kid, I really haven't had any "experiences" with God. What happened to yo uthat changed your outlook on Christianity?
(Whoa - deep question. I am really impressed with his honesty)

3. Why do you have to be so cool?
(I'm just going to assume he's not actually asking why *I* have to be so cool - because anyone who knows me knows I'm not! I'm thinking he's concerned about the pressure to be cool that surrounds him at school - and also follows him to confirmation. What do you out there in blogland think? You might be more in tune than I am.)

That's it for today, friends!

A Very Parker Picnic

2007-10-23T12:40:00.001-05:00

Kelsay came to visit from Sunday until this beautiful Tuesday morning.
Ordinary things are never so delightful as they are with a dear friend.

Confirmation Questions - Week 5

2007-10-23T12:03:00.001-05:00

Here are the confirmation questions I found in my box when I returned from an exciting few days at home (more to come on my exciting three days at home soon!). I don't think my dear confirmation partner gathered questions from our group (that, or maybe he'll be busy at home answering them himself...) so these are only from the other group. As you can see, I'm thinking they enjoyed a very focused conversation. I'm feeling a whole lot of "cut and paste" coming on...

1. Does Halloween have anything to do with Christianity?

2. Why is Halloween a big holiday when it is about the devil?

3. Does Halloween have anything to do with God?

4. What are you going to be for Halloween?

5. What does ‘Halloween’ mean?

6. Is Halloween considered worshipping the devil?

This is the point at which I'd like to add a fun photo or decorative image, of, say, a pumpkin or pretty October foliage. But I found this one and just have to add it. Perhaps I should label it "for mature audiences only. ...and now that I think about the maturity of this audience... well...

My Italian Crush

2007-10-18T18:56:00.001-05:00

Pat Rodio has lived up the street from me on Cedar in Fairfax, just at the halfway point of our long avenue, across from the old Keith mansion. He is a pillar of Fairfax City as one of the oldest residents and most involved in political processes of anyone out here. From the park service to the building up of residential zones, a park with the Rodio name, all the way down the details of street signage (the stop sign midway down our street marks where his youngest was killed by an automobile many, many years ago) and supporting the Little League baseball teams, Mr. Rodio has been involved in all aspects of Fairfax civil and political life. Mr. Rodio also likes to eat at Old Country Buffet every blessed day for lunch.
He is 87, about 5'5", feisty, and proudly Italian-American.

Most importantly, I am proud to be one of his two "favorite girlfriends" (the other one is my Mom!). What can he say? He's got a natural thing for Gessert women! He called my home today because "a little bird told him [I] was in town and [he] needed a little flirt time." When Mr. Rodio would be out on a walk and see me leave with a date, whether it be to prom or otherwise, he duly threatened: "hurt her and I'll break your knees." It's good to have links to the mafia.

He has followed me every step of the way, buying Girl Scout cookies only from me (I was his girlfriend beginning in kindergarten!) and making darn sure I was making the grade in school. It is strong men like him - rising to the top with a modest education, insatiable curiosity, deep love for his neighbor, and of course an incurable passion for old jazz - that we can look to today and thank God for.

Where have you gone Patrick Rodio? Our nation turns its lonely eyes to you... woo woo woo...

But before I get ahead of myself and dive onto the soap box (Mr. Rodio probably knows the origins of the idiom...!), I will always be so glad that my first boyfriend was and continues to be Mr. Patrick Rodio.

Check out a map to Rodio Park:
www.fairfaxva.gov/ParksRec/CityParks.asp

Fairfax, VA

2007-10-17T23:05:00.001-05:00

Thank God for my family. I'm home.

Oh Boy.

2007-10-17T00:41:00.000-05:00

Question #8. Gets you every time.
It seems like the free will will get you every time...
(Kristen, is there a grammatical term that names the double occurrence of one necessary word - like in the sentence above or "had had"?)

It's 12:42 and I'm leaving to go to VA in about 10 hours. Which means I need to have all these questions before I begin packing. Thats right. Before I begin packing.

Tonight I held the first "What Lutherans Believe Class" and 4 people showed up. They don't seem to be nearly as excited as I am about Reformation history. Silly me... and I thought the Augsburg Confession was a real thrill...

Confirmation Questions

2007-10-15T22:23:00.000-05:00

Today is blogtastic! Here is this weeks' selection of confirmation questions from my darling 8th graders. And Don. Except Don didn't ask a question. But I thought I'd mention him. Dear, dear Don.

1. If Adam and Eve didn't eat the fruit of knowledge, would be be like other animals?
2. Why did God create the earth and humans? He could of had the whole universe to Himself. Human are just sinful, what good do we do Him? (I like this kid!)
3. How is God with me at school?
4. Why does the Bible have so many different stories? (same one who asked "why does the Bible have so many weird stories?" Yikes... I don't know what to say!)
5. Why are there so many kinds of religions. Does it mader what you think all that maders is that you believe and love God. If you go to church and see people you don't know and some of them don't believe the same exact stuff you do, they were separate into smalle rhtings. All that maders is loving God. [sic]... I think I get the gist...]
6. How do I know if God forgives even if I have sinned greatly?
7. In God's mind, are we ever considered bad people?
8. Why does God not step in so that good people don't do bad things? (any ideas??)
9. How do you get confirmed?
10. Does God promise us whatever we want?

There you have it folks! Any help with them is very much welcomed and appreciated! Especially #8. That one always gets me. This is a theological 911 emergency!

Hurry, God Squad!

A Good Legal Resource

2007-10-15T16:22:00.001-05:00

For all of you out there on either the preaching or the listening end, pay attention:

http://www.suntimes.com/news/metro/585247,CST-NWS-priest03.article

I can't figure out if the moral of the story is:
a. don't criticize your preacher
b. don't humiliate your parishioner
c. do both a & b for the general amusement of others
d. send this to your candidacy committee for edification

Enjoy!

The Dangers of a Globalized World

2007-10-13T17:59:00.000-05:00

Fussy about good theology? Yes.
Fussy about making the grade? Guilty.
Fussy about eating a well-balanced meal? It's true.
Fussy about a clean, military-style made bed? I'll admit it.
Fussy about hygiene? Thankfully.

Fussy about a strict beauty regime, involving makeup, hair, nails, skin care, etc.? Not really.

Perhaps I should be - just ask my dear sorority little sister JoAnn - but I figure a pleasant, natural, well-kept look is about the extent I should go for the sake of day-to-day personal decoration. Essentials in my beauty routine include a shower (complete with soap), SPF 50, and lip balm. But today I was a little bored. And any good Puritan would know that boredom leads straight down the road to perdition... or in this case, to the nail salon.

Tomorrow I will be speaking at Pastor Norland's church about stewardship and Wednesday I will be flying out to the D.C. area to see my family and friends (and Candidacy Day, courtesy of the D.C. Metro Synod). This seemed to call for a flight of fancy, especially since the Uppity East Coasters delight in a well-kept Ann-Taylorized, J.Crew accessorized appearance. So I decided to get my nails done. And no, not just halfway... no siree. Hands and nails.

------------
Public Service Announcement for Confused Seminarians and Graduate Students:
In beauty speak, this is commonly known as a "manicure" and "pedicure," manicure from the Latin manus for "hand" (plus cura, "to care") and pedicure from the Latin pes or pedis (very close to the Greek pod- or pous for "foot"). These two words relate to the process the world understands to be effective hand and foot care.
------------

Now, the last time I had this done, I found the experience to be quite enjoyable. I was with my dear best friend Kelsay Parker - and really, what experience isn't enjoyable with Kelsay, I'd like to know! There is something about participating in beauty regimes that unite a girl with all females worldwide. Whether it is decorating with henna, pierced ears, lace-trimmed colors, looking lovely in a gown or traditional dress, wearing stodgy-yet-fashionable coats to work, preparing hair... it all has a uniting effect: "We have a secret little ladies club of self-care." I thought by getting my nails done I could re-enter into the fabulous world of feminine beauty and mystique. Who knew what would be in store?

But this time, it proved dangerous. Perhaps nearly deadly.

I drove all over tarnation trying to find a blessed place and stumbled across a shopping mall. A shopping mall! Who knew they had them in Indiana? Surely a shopping mall would provide a clean, welcoming environment for an unwitting beauty customer like myself.

"Nail Trix" seemed a little nicer and just as cost-effective as "Le Nails." Plus, it was busy with nice-looking Hoosiers milling around waiting their turn. I wrote my name on the waiting list.
As I turned to sit down, there appeared to be no where to sit and so I continued standing. No big deal. But then about five or six different salon employees came and asked me what I was doing there. Here is a rough verbatim of our conversation (I tried to put it in the accent/vernacular of the individuals involved - I believe the women and men who operate the salon are Vietnamese who have limited English):

Employee 1: "Oh, hello - you wait for nail done?"
Natalie:"Thank you, I'm waiting for an appointment. I just put my name on the list... I can just stand."
Employee 1: "Oh! You stand! You sit, maybe? You find place. I find you place."
(disappears to the back)
Employee 2: "You have name on list? Your name better be on list or you no get nails done!"
Natalie: "My name is on the list."
Employee 3: "What you want done?"
Natalie: "A manicure and pedicure"
Employee 2: "Oh you don't want eyebrow done? All girls want eyebrow!"
Natalie: "No, just the manicure and pedicure will be great, thanks."
Employee 1 (returns): "You find place to sit?"
Natalie (thinking "you said you were going to find a place"): "No, but I'm fine... I'll just wait."
Employee 4 (walking up from the back): "I be done soon. You find place to sit."
Natalie: "I'm fine, I"ll just wait, thanks."
Employee 5: "I done faster than her - I do your nail."
Natalie: "Okay, whatever works best for you."
A seat opens up and I sit down next to a woman laughing at this entire exchange.
Employee 4: "I finish faster than her - you come sit in chair."

I went and sat in the tall pedicure chair and watch in horror as she simply drains the water from the last woman and fills it up with water for me - no scrubbing or disinfect apparently needed. But maybe she knows better than me? I can roll with it.

As I'm enjoying the warm water and bubbles, Employee 5 is continuing to work on the feet of the woman next to me. This woman is Irish and we strike up a brief conversation. Then Employee 5 returns and speaks to the woman:

Employee 5: "You sit... dry nail."
Irish Woman: "When can I get up?"
Employee 5: "You sit!"
Irish Woman: "May I pay?"
Employee 5: "Yes, you pay."
Irish Woman: "How much?"
Employee 5: "[cannot understand her]"
Irish Woman: "What?"
Natalie: It is $15 (I had seen the sign)
Employee 5: "Yes."
The Irish woman, only here visiting her daughter for two weeks, plunks down $35.
Natalie: "You just put down $35. It is only $15."
The Irish woman puts down $10.
Natalie: "You need to put the $5 back in - and you should probably give her a tip - maybe three or four extra dollars."
The Irish woman puts down a total of $20 and says "Service was terrible! I don't want to give her more!" I don't say anything. Employee 5 picks up the money and says "Thank you - come back soon!"

Back to my own chair with Employee 4. She sits down and begins attacking my feet with various and sundry equipment. I never knew a clipper could hurt! And my hackles rose as she attached a straight blade to some contraption and then I observed loads of flesh from my feet fall onto the towel below. How blood did not flow - I'll never know. Then she took a scrub with the same consistency of steel wool and rubbed any feeling I had left off of the bottom of my feet. I had noted on the board outside that some sort of massage was also included. There is no better way to make me completely relaxed and happy than to rub my feet, so I was looking forward to this. I was ready to pour out an extra measure of blessing on any one person who was willing to do the job. And then she began. Her claws dug into the lines of my feet and I think my sinews and tendons are now permanently separated from the muscles. It was not the relaxing experience I had expected. Perhaps it is a cultural difference? Maybe Vietnamese people like painful, nail-digging massages. But I'm not going to pass judgment or make gross generalizations. My dear Vietnamese friends never seemed like they were really into pain...

Finally, the pain was over and I was recovering Employee 4 asked, "What color you want on nail - you want color or French?" I'm not sure what "French" is, but color I know. So I requested a dark pink, maybe a mauve? She comes out with blood red and "power suit pink." After negotiating my own versus her personal preference, I ended up with a deep berry color. It will do. Who knew a small Asian lady could apply such pressure in matters physical and decision-making?

As she led me over to experience the same high quality of hygiene and brute-force hand massage, another employee (Employee 6) sauntered over. She was falling out of her teeny-weeny blue polka-dot tankini... actually it was just a tank top... and proceeded to whisper sweet nothings in her native language to Employee 4. They were looking over my shoulder and giggling and I couldn't quite figure out if they were talking about me or another employee or another patron. What I wouldn't give to have had a firm grasp of Asian languages in that moment.

After my nails were turned the cheery berry red, I was led over to some UV lamps to dry.
Employee 4: "You sit. You sit five minute and go home."
Natalie said: "Okay. Thank you."
Natalie thought: "Never again. Indeed, I go home. I stay home."

Beauty seems more painful than its worth.

My Nails.
(just kidding...)

What Do You Say to the Guy Who Just Took Your Cheese?

2007-10-11T14:45:00.000-05:00

Thats Nach-o Cheese!

I have a dear friend who is looking for a particular kind of cheese.
Here is a brief description:

- It is a type of Syrian Cheese
- It is somewhat smoky in taste
- It is somewhat "curly"... looking like "pigs tail"
(my thinking is that it is the sort of dry, smoked Slovak cheese I used to love)

He is convinced it is Syrian Cheese.

I googled (not ogled) some Syrian cheese options and the closest match seems to be a type called "Shalal" (not halal). Does anyone have any ideas about how or where to purchase some of this? At least, unlike the last post, I am seeking legal substances...

No, Virginia, it's Mary Magdalene... not Mary Jane

2007-10-09T18:19:00.000-05:00

Now that you have had the chance to tour my lovely apartment, set in the middle of scenic downtown Valpo, I'd like to introduce you to my neighbors.

I have lived here for five weeks now and up until last Saturday I had not once caught even a glimpse of the foursome living above me. However, while I had never seen them, I did know an fair bit about them. For starters:
- I could tell they were young twenty-somethings.
-They also really like techno music with a bouncing, firm baseline.
-They have a gaming system with which they practice the art of loudly blowing things up.
- They recently bought Halo 3. I can't wait to hear how they do.
-They often return from their nighttime barhopping with shouts of joy and a loud narrative about their recent activities.

I was also fairly convinced that not only was there two boys and two girls living up there, chances are by the other loud nighttime activities they enjoy, they were coupled. And while I couldn't quite tell the layout of the apartment, from the sounds of it, they like to practice windsprints from about 1-3 a.m.

Long story short:
They didn't seem like the kind of neighbors I could call for a spare cup of sugar.

My grandmother and uncle visited last week and asked about my neighbors and I told them the story, but they mentioned, "you know, you really should at least meet them." So, after my family pulled out to go home, I was still in good spirits and thought, "Gee! I should go knock on their door!"

So I did.

Only one of the tenants was home, Chris, with a friend of his. Being a friendly kind of guy, he invited me in. Here is a short "verbatim" of our time together:

Chris: Hey, do you smoke?
Natalie: "No, thank you, though."
And then he held out a joint.
Chris:"No, I mean, do you "SMOKE."
Natalie: "Oh, no thank you - I think they do random drug testing at work."
And Chris again: "Oh, what do you do?"
Natalie: "I'm a pastor at Christ Lutheran up the road."
Chris: "Oh man. You aren't gonna call the moral police or the cops or anything, are you?"
Natalie: "No. Just be careful about putting out your smokes. Don't burn down the building and we'll be fine."
Chris: "Sounds good... Well, can you nuns drink?"
Natalie, feeling like her badboy image is being threatened: "I'm not a nun, and yes, I love a good beer."
Chris: "Oh good. We drink Coors here. I'll let you know when we party next."
Natalie: "Thanks! I'd love to come by."

Then Chris told me he has never gone to church and thought it might be cool to ask some
questions sometime.

The next day when I walked down the stairs, I noticed "someone" had stolen a few gold foil letters off the other mailboxes and posted "Pastor" above my lastname - with the "R" as a vertical hyphen and the rest haphazardly penned in.
I think I'll invite him to church for Advent.

Thats the news from out here. If you need a smoke, I know where to find it.

Peace out,
Pastor Marley

Prayer Requests

2007-10-08T14:00:00.000-05:00

Dear Readers,

I'd like to offer up a few prayer requests for those in need:

1. Arly and Shirley as Shirley battles ALS (Lou-Gehrig's Disease)
2. Roger and Dolores as Roger battles ALS as well

Both of these couples are strong in their faith and strong in their battles. But even while the Devil prowls around us and tries to separate us as sheep from the herd, we hear the voice of our Savior Jesus Christ coming to get us and bring us back to safety. It is in faith we know that even while we watch our old bodies turn against us, wasting away into death, our good Lord promises that what we see is not what will be. He tells us a scrap of bread is really His body, He calls up sinners to tell them God treats them as though they were saints, and proclaims the hope of life is hidden even in the unsightliness and fear of death. We live under the sign of the opposite. Life is hidden up in Shirley and Roger, even while they look more like death. Life is also hidden up in Arly and Dolores as their hands are blessed with love and patience - even while their eyes betray exhaustion, fear, and loneliness of a life without their beloved to come.

So lets lift these saints of the faith up in prayer. Lets be so bold as to pray for a miracle - that Roger and Shirley will have a complete restoration of the body - and lets do that without fear that we might be disappointed. I have to admit that I'm afraid of that disappointment. But just like yesterday's reading from the prophet Habakkuk (chapter 1 - the actual reading was 1:1-4 and 2:1-4... but the whole reading is great), we can take up the voice of the prophet and raise our cry of anger and fear of pain and death to God... in full expectation of a response. And God does respond (1:5):

"Be astonished! Be astounded! For a work is being done in your days that you would not believe... even if you were told."

God's right. There's a lot of things God can do, that I'm not sure I would believe, even if God gave me a pre-emptive heads up. But as a Christian, I've been called to cry out with honesty... and even with anticipation of response. The Holy Spirit puts a Word of sorrow and grief, of love for these dear neighbors and of expectation, trusting that the words don't fall on deaf ears. Its a tall order. But God even promised that He would provide the trust needed to even pray with such candor, strength, and persistence.

God will come in spite of death. Even though Roger's formerly strong body - once used to fly planes, hold his wife, and show his children and grandson how to drive a boat - now looks crumpled and rebellious against life, God is there with him. God promises to be found even as He hides life in the middle of death. God comes not in the holy places, but in the middle of life; coming only to die in a junk heap outside of Jerusalem. God has come in His Son Jesus Christ to raise this sick man and sick woman from the rubble and waste of their old bodies.

So even while we can live in certainty that their bodies will be renewed as they are ushered into the arms of God in heaven, lets take up the mantle of the prophet Habakkuk and cry out with question and expectation "Violence! And you will not save?"

God, I'm sure You will astonish us - and give us strength to believe even in the face of death. So come now and let us see Your saving hand. We're waiting, impatiently and with expectation.

Oh, and I forgot one who is also very important:
Please pray for Shelton Root, who has had a major facial reconstruction (rhinoplasty). He's in quite a bit of pain and needs prayers for comfort, strength, and faith that it is God who will provide for him.

Mike Huckabee responds to evolution question

2007-10-08T10:56:00.001-05:00

This video is startling, as a Presidential candidate chooses to clearly and directly answer a question posed to him by the inimitable Wolf Blitzer (who sometimes moonlights undercover at Luther Seminary under the pseudonym "Dr. Fred Gaiser"). While I am not attempting to make any sort of political statement in this post regarding my future voting intentions, Mr. Huckabee's response is showing himself to be both a notable and admirable candidate. Enjoy!

Happy Friendship Anniversary!

2007-10-05T22:06:00.001-05:00

Today marks a very special day in my life.

Today is the 1-year friendship anniversary for Shannyn Magee and I! She and I met for the first time in the short days before the 2006 Twin Cities Marathon, then we became "real" friends while running the first few miles of the TCM together. Shannyn was amazing! She really helped me get through the first 5 miles.

In addition to that - pastors take note - she is one of the few truly caring, down-to-earth and theologically astute youth pastors I have met during my few years at seminary. But hands off! I call dibs on Shan for associate in the years to come.

Cheers to a great year of friendship, Shannyn - and here's to many more!

(this is a photo of Shannyn and I running the marathon together)

Stump the Dummy

2007-10-03T20:30:00.000-05:00

Dear Readers,

It seems that when it rains it pours - at least as far as posting new blogs is concerned.

Today was confirmation night and it went pretty well. This was the first one I have taught (the pastor is gone) and the topic was "Introduction to the Scripture" for the 8th graders. We had a great time and the kids were really engaged!

At the end of every session I have them turn in a question about the lesson, God, life, how faith relates to life - anything. But they have to turn in one per week. They put their name on the question and then I get busy with my own homework and write them out a response by the following week. They usually ask really great question - they become some of my best teachers. Here is a selection of the great questions they turned in this week. Enjoy!:

1. If God doesn't want us to sin, why did he put the tree of knowledge in the Garden of Eden?
2. Did Martain Luther start the Luthern chirch? (sic)
3. Over the times that you are influenced to move away from God, how does he keep bringing you back to him?
4. Why did God want to name Jesus, Jesus?
5. Why did the people call the Bible, the Bible and where did they get all the names for the chapters?
6. How can God love someone through someone when he already loves the person?
7. What are some ways that we can turn away from God, and how can we refrain from this as much as possible?
8. Why does God forgive every person no matter what the person does?
9. If we beleive that we will go to heaven for believing in our God, then what will happen to the people that believe in a different God or no God at all?
10. What is the job of an angel?
11.Why does the Bible have weird stories?
12.Can the Bible be added on to?
13.If all your sins are forgiven , then will you be forgiven for murdering?
14.How do you think God watches us all?
15.Why did they decide to put Song of Songs in the Bible?
16. If God created everything, then why did he create the Devil?
17.Where did the Devil come from?

If anyone has any suggestions on how to answer some of these, please throw your hat in with ideas! I really enjoy these kids. They are an insightful group, aren't they? There's nothing more challenging than a group of 8th graders in the grips of junior high - but I'm convinced that God has a stronger hold.

A Side Note

2007-10-03T14:02:00.000-05:00

Just a note that I am describing members of the church under alternative names/identities. I hope you see the humor in the descriptions rather than any disdain! I esteem the members of this congregation and am grateful to be part of this community.

Don.

2007-10-02T17:08:00.000-05:00

I have a gentleman at my church named Don. I'm about to hit the eject button on him.

Even though the pastor said, "I don't like kids," he is very jealous of his teaching time for 8th grade confirmation. Pastor teaches for about 45 minutes and then we break into two groups for reflection and discussion. Betty and Dan lead one, Don and I lead the other.

Now, Don is a former commanding officer in the Canadian Navy (we can't deport him, he took the citizenship oath last week). He is really into order and morality. There is a clear way one should do everything - including, and especially, theology. The Bible is clearly a book of rules we should take seriously if we are ever to hammer out the straight and narrow to heaven.

The first week was fine. After the pastor fumbled on "The Salvation Story" (where Jesus comes to get you out of the "Death Camp" and you better reach up and grab His hand otherwise you won't be saved... if I can locate the pamphlet, I'll try to scan it for humor's sake), Don and I broke into our small group. Our discussion was about sin - What is sin. Am I sinful? So I had the kids put a percentage on how much "sin" and how much "good" they each thought they were. We eventually got to realization humanity is 100% sinful with God, in Christ, giving us the title "100% saved" alongside the sinner piece. Don didn't like that too much. So ever since I threatened his Pelagian niceties, Don has taken over the group entirely. He talks over me, He undercuts my questions, and has a horrible habit of essentially damning the kids to a life of fearing God as a big stick. You gossip? It's hell for you. You don't listen to your parents? I hope you don't like the flames. You cheat on a test? No love for you! According to Don, Jesus has left the building. Or is simply a moral superstar of Mary Katherine Gallagher's caliber.

It gets better.

We held a leadership huddle in which I was supposed to present. I titled the study, "Oprah is Not Your Preacher." Everyone seemed to get on the ride with me. Except Don. Apparently telling kids their sins are forgiven in the name of Jesus Christ is a really bad idea. So Don stood up and said, "I'd like to read something out of Scripture:

A woman should learn in quietness and full submission. I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man; she must be silent. For Adam was formed first, then Eve. And Adam was not the one deceived; it was the woman who was deceived and became a sinner.
(1 Timothy 2:11-13)

So how do address that, Vicar? Seems like you shouldn't be doing all this talking in church."

Thank you, Don. A wonderful moment in the life of this ministry. I answered by explaining how Scripture interprets Scripture. The purpose of Scripture is not to be a treasure map or rule book to guide one into heaven. Scripture instead tells the story of how God comes for His people - and He will have them, whether they like it, know they need it, or care. And so even the rules of Scripture are intended to promote those things which give life - to promote this proclamation of God's persistent love to create faith in Him, specifically through Jesus Christ. Because to have faith, is to have real life. Last I checked, my female parts did not get in the way of proclaiming this Word.

Thats right, Don. Jesus loves you too.

Nursing Homes

2007-09-27T21:57:00.001-05:00

Today I had the good pleasure of taking communion to three of our parishioners - one at a nursing home and a married couple shut in at home. I'm not entirely sure I should say "good pleasure," either. Honestly, these visits have me terrified. Specifically, of nursing homes. The first visit was in a nursing home that looked something akin to a dilapidated state college dormitory - replete with mulleted nurses and scroungy looking orderlies that looked like they couldn't wait for their evening romp at the bar. And the people. At least state college students generally look really happy to be in school. These elderly people were sitting on cracked and weathered chairs. Some had their mouths open and looked like they could barely take another breath. Bob Barker reruns, among other trash talk shows, blared loudly down the tacky halls. All of the wizened little Grandmas were hobbling or creeping in wheelchairs down the hall. And the smell. At least hospitals smell sterile. The home smelled strange. Like it just didn't belong. Life here seems like a sentence for having done something "wrong." Like not having exercised enough or being too poor to find a nice home - like those Sunrise homes which look like they belong on the pages of Anne of Green Gables, right?

A lot of these men and women suffer from dementia and Alzheimers. Some have Parkinsons. Most of them have crumpled muscles, unable to scoot them even from one end of the davenport to the other. I visited Agnes and she was just so happy to have a visitor! But she wished she could have a visit - or just communion - a little more often. I can't tell quite why she is "in there." Why was she "sentenced" to life in this dumpy little Indiana building? Its called "Whispering Pines." What a silly name for a nursing home. It reminds me of those "death videos" my CPE hospital would put on in the rooms of the dying. Scenes of nature with elevator music in the background. And then it seemed like such an injustice and almost silly and stupid to turn off that television. As if to say, "shows over, folks! Nothing more to see here! Stay tuned for..."

I couldn't tell if I was afraid of the idea I could end up in one of these places someday. Or that someone I love could end up here. Or that getting old in our culture is to decrease in value to the point that one must be shut away in ugly buildings that the young and vibrant can effectively and comfortably avoid. Sometimes it seems like "getting old" is a disease in our western eyes. No amount of Botox will be able to cure it.

While I visited Agnes and the other couple in their home, I began to think of the disciples arguing about who is the greatest from Matthew 18. Then Jesus puts a little child in the midst of them... any questions?

Matthew 18
1 At that time the disciples came to Jesus and asked, "Who, then, is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?" 2 He called a little child, whom he placed among them. 3 And he said: "Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. 4 Therefore, whoever takes a humble place—becoming like this child—is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. 5 And whoever welcomes one such child in my name welcomes me.

I'm wondering if it wouldn't be more appropriate for our day and age to replace that little child with one of the little old ladies from the nursing home. Maybe with Agnes. The disciples wouldn't have wanted to become like little children; children were nothing. They were as good as slaves. Society waited to see if they would be of any use. It would be scary for disciples to think they would be judged on the basis of their worthlessness.

Its not much different today either with these old people. The nursing home is frightening for me probably because it is such a stark reminder that while even a short time ago these ladies were brides, cooking, mothering, running, reading, talking, traveling, going out to eat, playing games, calling friends, playing with grandchildren. They were just like me. They all have had hopes and dreams, and probably still do. But now they are all but forgotten. Sitting on rickety chairs watching Springer - because the orderly turned on the telly and none of the ladies legs can carry them all the way to change the channel. These women live in the humble place. A place of helplessness. The place where today I became most uncomfortable with Jesus placing a wrinkly face in front of me and saying, "see? become like this. This, right here, is the kingdom of heaven." These little old ladies are important because God says they are. They are His daughters. They aren't important because I give them the title or because society believes they are all that great. Look at them... they are shut up in a grungy north Indiana nursing home. But here they are. Jesus preachers speaking loud and clear to me about who and what God values. It's a scary lesson for a young intern pastor with big dreams.

2007-09-25T14:53:00.001-05:00

This afternoon while I was going into the church fridge for some cheese and crackers, I found I had to move an entire half a carrot cake to get to the goods. So, as I pulled the cake out (you know, the beautifully decorated leadership carrot cake, complete with fancy icing), the entire cardboard bottom took a nosedive out of its plastic casing. Face down on the floor. I was able to pick it up and it doesn't look like it had such a mishap... but...

So that was my afternoon.

Good Evening

2007-09-23T20:59:00.000-05:00

Good Evening -

My very favorite word in the English language is "evening." It has such a smooth, parallel sound to it and reminds me of my favorite time of day.

I haven't posted much in the last week as I have been very busy. Busy visiting, busy writing, busy planning, busy leading and following... and busy discovering why Eugene Peterson understands "busy" as pastoral blasphemy. The way he describes his idea is just about right, however. "Busy" can be a simple excuse to avoid responsibility or to simply look as though one is doing their task. "Busy" for a pastor might also mean allowing others to simply take over his or her schedule - absolving oneself of boundaries. Peterson thinks pastors must have command over his or her daily planner and learn to schedule clear time boundaries around prayer, scripture study, and time with friends and family. That being said...

I've been busy all week. I've been learning how to say "yes" and follow through, and say "no" and make faint attempts at not feeling guilty about it.

A few fun things about the week:

1. Visiting Jim and Ruth at the hospital. Jim was in for a few procedures and he told me loads of great stories. He was the only one in his very extended family who "made it out" without becoming a pastor! He was a teacher and loved every moment of it.
2. Going to the Valparaiso University womens volleyball game (against Central Indiana U.) with a professor and his family (Dr. Mark Bartusch - head of my internship committee). VU won! And to top it off Mark began squinting across the court and said, "Oh! There's Jim and Ruth!" I said, "No way! I was just visiting him in the hospital this morning!" But no - there they were!
3. Really enjoying my new membership at the YMCA. I visit there VERY regularly to experience the joys of sweat and the runners high - as well as the free sauna!
4. The strangest part of this is being called "Vicar." It is apparently my name, now. "Hi, Vicar!" I hear it at the Y, at church, at the grocery... everywhere! Some people in the congregation who I have become close with sometimes hesitantly ask me if they might call me "Natalie" outside of church (of course!). My name is a title. Strange.

And the highlight of this past week was certainly tonights' youth group meeting. The kids are very close to one another and are a great mix of silly and thoughtful. They pick one another up and guide the younger ones with cheers and a gentle hand. We have one boy who deals with some mild form of autism - extremely bright and delayed socially by a margin. While we sang the opening to our worship tonight he perfectly and beautifully - throwing caution to the wind - sang harmonies and support tunes. For a freshman boy who can't sit still... amazing. Everyone in the group was so quick to support him and he was just basking in it.

We closed with "Prayer around the Cross" - a service of candles, scripture and soft song.

It has been a good week - busy in the un-Peterson way, I hope. I'm in for it this week, though! Jerry will be gone, visitations abound, and I've got the whole set of services to plan for next Sunday - baptism and all... !

My New Home

2007-09-13T12:06:00.000-05:00

Welcome to my apartment! I live above the Presbyterians, below four party animals, and have Missouri Synod landlords. This year, I fully expect to increase in holiness due to my proximity to the devout PCUSA and LCMS folks sandwiching me on all ends. I am also quite close to Chicago, which will hopefully encourage some visitors - you, there, in blogland! Just call ahead and I will be happy to host your Chicagoland experience!

(I have wanted to post these photos for about two weeks and had not yet downloaded them from the disk
- so a few minor organizational changes have been made in the meantime.)

Let us embark on El Grande Tour:

Welcome to my living room
Here you will enjoy the baroque Ikea throw and pillows
as well as the maps of exotic places adorning the wall.
The congregation has kindly loaned me a davenport,
two chairs, and a loveseat for the year!

A view from the main room of the dining area,
beautiful gas fireplace, and study (around the corner to the right)
Aren't the windows terrific?

My kitchen

The bat cave - I mean, bedroom

The bedroom head-on

My dear, devoted protester friends who arrive like
clockwork at 8 o'clock on Saturday morning
in front of the courthouse (across the street) to encourage
horn-honking and other crimes of passion at that hour
of the morning.

That concludes our brief tour of the Gessert digs. Stay tuned for more exciting apartment updates as the health department investigates the livability of this abode due to raw sewage gas and other E.coli related concerns...

p.s.
For those of you would like my address, all mail is being sent to the church
(where there is a secured mailbox).
And remember, every vicar loves mail - but few as much as this vicar... !
I hope to hear from you soon!:

Vicar Natalie
***After Good Inquest and Advice from One Mrs. Jessica NP, this address has been removed***
For further address information, please make requests as a comment on the blog or send me an email!

Late-Breaking News

2007-09-10T16:35:00.000-05:00

Moments after my last post and one meeting later, a couple from the church called asking if they could go out with me for the afternoon. I thought, "of course! A great opportunity to 'read my audience'... maybe discover some pastoral care needs, etc...!" They came to pick me up and said, "hey, we're retirees and would really like to take you to a movie before we eat!" I said, "Great! Sounds like fun."

We arrived at the movie theater and they bought tickets to:

Thats right. The adventures of Clive Owen and how he kills 200+ men all while holding a newborn infant (which he delivered) and falls in love with a wet nurse of loose morality.

I must say, after this we ended up having a wonderful time at the restaurant and each of them received a full and complete absolution in the name of Jesus Christ (for sins unrelated to this film!). They really are wonderful people with kind hearts and I'm so blessed by their presence in this congregation. Both are salt of the earth and very concerned with the needs and welfare of their brothers and sisters in Christ... and they knew their sister Natalie needed a trip to Shoot Em' Up!

Gloria Jean, My Queen

2007-09-10T11:50:00.000-05:00

My new best friend is the gourmet coffee machine outside of my corner office. Gloria Jean? I'd like to shake her hand! Christ LC has a "Coffering Ministry" in which there is a great little corner full of tasty coffee, tea, and hot chocolate. This is proving mighty helpful in my rush to kick the Diet Cola habit!

This was my second full week of work here in Midwesternia and it was full of bits and pieces. Right now I'm a little frustrated because I feel as though each one of these blog entries should begin with "Dear Diary..." Lots of photos, odds and ends... I'm still trying to create a routine where I have regular visits, responsibilities, etc. I am still in the limbo of learning names in the congregation and prodding the staff to remember I'm here and have a keen desires and need for daily work (see Explanation to the First Article of the Creed). As for learning names, I have discovered that the best fallbacks are "Jim" and "John" or "Karen" and "Kathy." Two Olga's later, and its just about right. Thank goodness for Midwestern simplicity!

As for responsibilities though, strangely enough for a Lutheran church, there are little to no sick or shut-in people, so visitation is at a premium. Thank God for the health of these people! But it seems to leave the staff (myself included) in such a strange position of work beginning only after these healthy, vibrant people get out of work, school, and the laundry list of activities. So now I am left with lots of time during the day to study and put together Bible and catechetical studies, activities, and so on. I also find it strange that one of the jobs of "pastor" seems to simply "be available." But I've never been comfortable with just waiting around. I want to DO something! My jealousy of Luther Seminarians who are back to school today abounds. Hopefully this is my last "Dear Diary-esque" entry, as I have a few ideas of how to pick up a little more this weekgiven new comfort levels.

Until then, here are a few highlights of this past week:

1. Kelsay and Dave came to visit Tuesday afternoon! Chinese food never tastes so good as with them!

2. Choir Practice Kick-off at the pastors house. Jello salad, mac and cheese, pulled pork with a side dish of hymn-sing... need I say more?

3. Confirmation: my favorite part of the week. I have a wonderful, shy, and curious group of 9 8th graders! We talked about what sin actually is and then put percentages on ourselves about how much "sin" and how much "good" we each are - then had a great talk about what confession and absolution is.

4. I was so annoyed at the notion of staying inside for yet another weekend evening, so I grabbed a good book and headed up the road to Pikk's Tavern. My intention was to enjoy a bowl of "Seafood Chowdah" as found on their online menu with a side of beer battered onion rings (has anyone noticed how "food intensive" this blog has been?), but they were clean out! So instead I ordered a bacon cheeseburger, medium rare. When it was delivered I should have realized what I was getting into, especially with steak tartar on the menu. I bit in and it was nearly raw inside. What an AMAZING burger! I'm a little carnivorous when it comes down to it - and too many of those would make me a shut-in before too long with congestive heart failure. But thank goodness for a soft, tasty burger! (I apologize for the description to my vegetarian cousins and friends!).

5. Popcorn Festival: Lastly, a little slice of Americana. I woke up on Saturday morning, grabbed a bowl of cereal and sat by the kitchen window to watch the Home of Orville Redenbacher's Popcorn Parade! Here are a few photos from the parade and the brat stand Christ LC has manned for 29 years and counting (even though I enjoyed my third corndog and pieroshki's from the Catholic booth!):

Get all of your Popcorn Informational
needs met here!

Valparaiso Marching Band

Valparaiso Football Team Pride!
(Brings back oh-so-fond memories of Fairfax HS)

Hot Air Balloon guys who decided the Valpo trees
just weren't that pretty - so why not singe them down a bit?

Fearless Youth Director Tammy dogging the Brat station
and my Confirmation group partner Don bratting the Dog station

For another update... come back in a day or two!

Almost Heaven, Indiana

2007-09-04T22:43:00.001-05:00

Although I'm not positive those are the original John Denver lyrics, lets call it "close enough." Even though there are no mountains, the Indiana Walmart in town is highly reminiscent of the WV landscape.

The drive to Indiana was uneventful from St. Paul to Madison. Dad and I stopped to stay with The inimitable Shannyn Magee and her wonderful sister Jenny!

However, the drive from Madison to Valpo should have taken about 3.5-4 hours. Dad and I left at 8am and finally pulled up to Valpo at 6:30pm. Due to major flooding the lanes of I-94 were closed, leaving Dad and I with hours and hours of backup. We finally plowed through Chicago but were rerouted through Gary, IN down unmarked streets and it took another 1.5 hours to go the remaining 15 miles. Navigating Gary is very unpleasant. Below you can see a photo of the welcome sign as well as exit #1. The traffic was so bad these pics were taken at a complete stop.

Upon arrival, however, I was greeted right away by Pastor Jerry Castleman, his dear wife Claudia and the Sanchez family - Ernie, DJ and their remarkably strong son, Tony. We somehow managed to divert traffic on the busy street and move everything upstairs (23 stairs, to be exact, according to Jerry and Dad!) in about an hour. Dad and I stayed with the Castleman's that Saturday night and enjoyed great conversation and a terrific supper! I am very comfortable with Jerry and am increasingly excited for the start of this internship year. During supper he commented: "Above all, I love the laity - they are the most important part of this ministry we have." This is a man to take note of, it seems.

Sunday morning came far too early and I made it, standing, through three services. Christ Lutheran has an 8:00, 9:30, and 11:00 service. This congregation went out of its way to overwhelm me with such a kind welcome. There was a welcome sign at the front door and I was installed publicly at all three services. When I listened to the promises asked of me as well as the congregation, I quickly recognized the gravity of the work of ministry. There is a clear call for me to serve this congregation during the upcoming year and the congregation promised to support and speak into this work. There is immeasurable love and responsibility in these promises.

Yet, every time I become nervous about the future there is a promise from Jesus to hang my hat on. God has provided a clear call for this next year - there is a place, people who God will use to speak love and edification, and hope that there is a life-filled future. As Pastor Judy Bangsund from San Jose, CA wrote: See Exodus 23:20 for guidance - "See I have sent my angel ahead of you to guard you on your way and to bring to the place that I have prepared."

While I'm not sure Indiana is quite what I had in mind, God certainly prepared it! But Judy is another one of those pastors to sit up and listen to - she had a Word for me, so I'll just sit back and take it! So let's see what other promises are yet to unfold... !

Modeling my lovely new alb

The congregation now meets in what was intended to be the gymnasium. They are growing in numbers by the dozen! Here is a photo of the installation taken by Dad - I'm not sure if it was before or after my Mom called and the cell phone went off loudly for all to enjoy! I was having flashbacks of Dr. Haemig giving me the evil eye for inappropriately loud cell phone noise!

P.S. Cheers to the Michel's for joining Dad and I! These dear, longtime friends (who supposedly "changed [my] diapers") came down from Chicago and were just delightful to spend our Sunday afternoon with both at church and over brunch.

Packing-Mania!

2007-09-01T00:24:00.001-05:00

...Or should I say "Post-Mania?" While I know you all out there in blogland are anxiously awaiting some deep theological reflecting, most recently life has lent itself to the more earthy and base experience: Moving.

Moving is not a foreign experience for me. My short list includes Minot, Omaha, Ypsilanti, Fairfax, Morfelden (where is the umlaut key?), Roanoke, Bratislava, St. Paul, and Gottingen (again, umlaut please). Throw in Valparaiso and it's a party! But I realize now all of those moves were possible with thanks to [an exhausted] Mom and Dad as well as government-hired movers. No such luck with the ELCA! I packed and packed for two weeks preparing for this move and it culminated beautifully as the photos will testify below.

As I finally to post on the moving experience, I would like to take this altogether-too-brief opportunity to publicly thank all of my dear friends and dear Dad who came together for a day of packing and fellowship.

Dad, Dean, and Norma in a heated discussion about global warming
(after Norma showed off her amazing packing expertise!)

Roy, Jason, and Michael taking a break. Roy had just finished
helping by "babysitting the loo paper" and gathering
the children for "Story Time with Uncle Roy."
Who needs New Testament skills
when you've got people skills like that?

The Oslunds: Doug and Amy with Signey, Simon, and Nora
- such great helpers!
Nora's moving specialty was cookie eating!

More helpers! The irreplaceable Emily Grier who held mountains of boxes from toppling and helpers Katie Grier and Mrs. Renee Kowlessar (married now for two weeks, tomorrow!)

Two other kids, Adam and Carl, just along for the free food!
Pastor Carl is seen here abandoning his regularly scheduled
piety for the lusty pleasures of pizza and beer.

Packer Extraordinaire, Paula - joined by her helper Maggie!
You should have seen that truck...
This move could not have been possible without Paula's Tetris-like genius!

My Spaetzle-Making, Furniture-Lifting, Floor-Cleaning, Belly-Laughing, Creepy-Couple-Same-T-Shirt-Wearing Heroes Dave and Kelsay!

Topped off with my driving hat... It's off to Indiana!

...and three cheers to Dad for driving the Penske! Dad wins the Lifetime Commitment award for supporting his daughter in strange and wonderful ways. Whether buying the extra Diet Coke for us to stay lucid or keeping cool when the traffic is mounting to astronomical proportions, Dad got us through the drive. I couldn't have been blessed with a better Father. Thanks, Dad!

Red in the Blue State?

2007-08-31T15:38:00.000-05:00

Or is that Blue in the Red?
I missed the most important fair photo of all

A photo opportunity with one proud Mrs. Franni Franken holding a trading card of her husband with panache. My Dad will be so proud... :)

Johnny's Gone Off to the Fair

2007-08-29T08:57:00.001-05:00

I can't believe I live in Indiana. So, in an effort to ease the transition - for your viewing pleasure - are a few photos of my last day in St. Paul, Minnesota. Hooray for the "Great Minnesota Get-Together!"

The State Fair:

Paula, David, and I loitering in front of the Pronto Pup stand: Wieners Dun in a Bun!

My SECOND corn dog ever- Yum! Three cheers to Luther Seminary
for introducing me to these tasty treats. I need more of those... Pronto! (haha!)

Cheese Curds!

As you can see, the cornerstone of the State Fair for us non-farming folk is FOOD! Here we see the state fair goer enjoying a large fresh malted strawberry dairy shake - from the Dairy Stand in the Dairy barn! Also included in this barn are a the daily Dairy Princess butter carvings.Mike Pomeranz and Belinda Jenson reporting the 5 o'clock news. We made it on television! I'll miss these two. The Chicagoland reporters just aren't the same... A visit to the Miracle of Birth Barn. I think you might thank me for not photographing the "farrowing" process, but here is a beautiful hours-old lamb. Paula did not seem to appreciate my little lamb impressions ("maaah!") as much as the ewe did. You're different!

An unfortunate run-in with a large puddle. It rained all day long!

Face-off! After a very heated table discussion about Green vs. Red...
I'll leave it to you readers to decide.

Three cheers for the state fair! I will post more about moving day and Indiana very soon.

What's a Hoosier?

2007-08-22T15:33:00.001-05:00

While perusing through the last post I'm sure many of those photographs brought to mind significant land marks, historic events, or family vacations. For example, Arizona might make one think "Grand Canyon." The dazzling New England autumn might cause you to reminisce about your days of studying the Boston Tea Party, the great pilgrim landing, or for you sports fans, the home base of ESPN. And of course Germany will bring to mind the hero of the faith Martin Luther, the Eternal Mystery of King Ludwig II and his crazy Neuschwanstein castle, and piles of spaetzle with wurst.

But Indiana, it seems, might be a slightly greater mystery than King Ludwig. Therefore, a little research was in order - and without further ado, I'd like to present:

FUN FACTS ABOUT INDIANA
I chose this image because it is an elevation map. As you can see, Indiana is FLAT. Please visit, but do not expect a mountain hiking adventure! This is the 19th state admitted to the union and has grown to include the exciting large city destinations of: Indianapolis. And, well, Indianapolis. But, there are a number of other interesting smaller cities including Lafayette (Purdue U.), South Bend (Rudy! Rudy!), Fort Wayne (cheers to Concordia Seminary!), and Valparaiso (of course). Additionally, when you come to visit, we will go to the Dunes. This is the beautiful state park on the southern edge of Lake Michigan. And while I don't live in Illinois, I also live about forty minutes from Chicago. We will not be visiting Gary, IN, despite the slew of show tune recitations I receive (compliments of The Music Man).

Also interesting: Indiana is also overwhelmingly Roman Catholic and has one of the best nationally-ranked music programs at Indiana U. IN also votes nominally red, but claims lots of other "reds" including the cardinal (state bird) and peony (state flower). I'm a little concerned about the state motto, "Crossroads of America" - does this mean "we're not that great, so spring from here and go somewhere else?" I hope not!

Great and/or Interesting People from Indiana:
- Abe Lincoln spent most of his childhood in IN... come and see his log cabin!
- Dave Letterman of the Late Show
- Michael Jackson (lets qualify him as "interesting," shall we?)
- Kurt Vonnegut (Slaughterhouse 5)
- Orville Redenbacher (Yes, I have been thoroughly informed about the Popcorn Fest!)
- Jimmy Hoffa (I think he's buried under the Valpo chapel... anyone to help dig?)
- Larry Bird

... and finally: John Cougar Mellencamp

As noted in some of the comments, I have been assigned the quest to find John Mellencamp as the Holy Grail of Indiana. I don't know much about him, I've heard that he sings the "Jack and Diane" song... but I'll find him yet! Anyone with the middle name "Cougar" must be pretty cool. Who knows? Maybe he's got an unresolved need for a Lutheran preacher in his band of roadies?

At this point I also need to publicly announce the best part of Indiana happens to be sitting square in the middle Valparaiso: The delightful people of my future congregation. They are doing everything possible to ensure this move is not only easy, but even delightful! The pastor, his wife, and a number of congregation members have called, written emails, and even gathered some needed furniture and a moving contingency. Who could ask for a better welcome? While these posts betray some pre-Indiana anxiety, but please read them as tongue-in-cheek as I have full confidence that this will be a happy, healthy, and full year of learning and ministry!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

And now for the most important question of all: What is a Hoosier?

Answer:
No one knows. It is not a funny looking turkey (see Hokie), a fierce Spartan (Go Green! MSU!), a funny looking woodland creature (Go Gophers!), or a Maroon (all hail Roanoke College! - at least we're a mean looking color!). Maybe instead of Mellencamp, I'll instead simply stumble across the etymological roots of the word and change the future of Indiana!

Coming Soon: Fun Photos and Posts about the Moving process
(this is almost as fun as seeing your best friends vacation pictures!)

To Where?

2007-08-16T19:57:00.001-05:00

Pastoral internship is the highly anticipated third year adventure when pale-faced seminarians emerge, blinking, from their two years of library residence and head out for “the real world.” Here is a postcard sampling of some of the true to life and exotic places our Luther Seminary interns are headed:

Jeni:

ARIZONA!

Colin:

VEGAS!

Ari and Dave:

FLORIDA!

Jen, Amanda, and Amber:

PACIFIC NORTHWEST!

Mary, Eddie, and Mark:

NEW ENGLAND!

Sarah:

DEUTSCHLAND!

As you might imagine, I was very excited to open the little note in my inbox to discover where my own yearlong adventure in the American wilderness would begin.

So without further ado, I’d like to present:

INDIANA.

My Church

Just kidding! It's not my church.
Really, it's just a photo of an Indiana factory I found.

But as you may notice, I'm in for a very different 12-month "vacation" than my compatriots. Stay tuned for more information about this strange land we call: INDIANA.